Grif.Net

A woman was in the hospital for intensive tests. The doctor said to her, “I have some bad news for you. You only have three months to live.” “Oh that’s terrible,” the woman sighed. “What would recommend for me to do?” The doctor replied, “I would advise you to go…

A guy in my office revealed to me that, in a moment of tender romantic passion he had asked his girlfriend to marry him. Of course I immediately asked, “What did she say?” “I don’t know. She hasn’t returned my text yet.” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus Knows…

Here is a good question to ask your clergymen or anyone who comes across as if they know all about the Bible. Yes, I speak from personal embarrassment . . . Ask, “If David was the father of Solomon, and Joab was the son of Zeruiah, what relation was Zeruiah…

When his computer printer began to print out faintly, a man called the repair shop. The clerk said: “From your description of the problem, the printer probably only needs cleaning. It will cost you $50 if you bring it in and have it cleaned here, so really you’d be better…

Lets be honest. English is a quite silly language. There is no egg in the eggplant, no ham in the hamburger, and neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England. French fries were not invented in France. We sometimes take English for granted, but…

If you start with a cage containing five monkeys and inside the cage, hang a banana on a string from the top and then you place a set of stairs under the banana, before long a monkey will go to the stairs and climb toward the banana. As soon as…

Some years ago my family and I visited Egypt. Did the pyramids, Egyptian Museum (with King Tut treasures), the Sphinx, etc. At a bazaar shop we were told that many of the items on sale were cheap reproductions for tourists, but others were genuine. Holding up a curious find, I…

Some years ago the president of a Baptist College shared some humor about the number of the beast. He said, “If you can’t laugh at Satan and make fun of the Beast, you have problems.” So from his sermon illustration comes . . . 666 Mark of the Beast 668…

Here are the first names AND a clue to help you identify some famous brothers. They get harder the further you go. Bet you can’t figure out the FAMILY NAME of them all. _______ Orville and Wilbur had the right stuff _______ Paul, Nicholas and Joseph are heartthrobs today _______…

Was told that a precious little girl walked into a pet shop last Saturday (the day before Easter) and asked, “Excuthe me, thir, do you have any widdle bunny wabbits?” The shopkeeper’s heart melted. He got down on his knee so that he was on her level, and said, “Do…

How special is your zip code? In 1963 the US Postal System launched its “Zone Improvement Plan” – a five-digit code (called by acronym “ZIP”) to help speed sorting and delivery of mail. Like prime pieces of real estate, a user-friendly ZIP is based on location, location, location. The codes…

Dr. Stearns was preaching in Philadelphia. At the close of the service a stranger came to him and said, “I don’t like the way you spoke about the cross. I think that instead of emphasizing the death of Christ, it would be far better to preach Jesus, the Teacher and…

God loves me. Why? His choice and His grace alone; nothing about me deserves either His grace or love. Rather than leave me in my sin, He sent his own son, Jesus, to pay the penalty my sin demanded. Although Jesus lived a sinless life, he died in my place.…