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[I am excited. On an upcoming trip to Canada and New England later this year I have planned an entire day in the Boston area to visit both the Lexington and Concord battlefields, the birthplace of the Revolution. The poem will take on visual meaning.] Listen my children and you…

A blind man walked into a department store with his seeing-eye dog on a leash. As usual the store manager behind the customer service counter looked up, noticed the customer is blind, and not wanting to stare quickly looks away again. Out of the corner of his eye the manager…

A little old lady is sitting on a park bench in “The Villages,” a Florida adult community. A man walks over and sits down on the other end of the bench. After a few moments, the woman asks, “Are you a stranger here?” He replies, “I lived here years ago.”…

[How many “trillions” in new taxes am I (and my grandchildren) going to pay for a socialist America? It will get worse. So might as well laugh about it instead of cry] America is the land of opportunity. Everyone can become a taxpayer. Q: What’s the definition of a good…

Read in the paper about a fellow who had just finished reading a new book entitled, ‘YOU CAN BE THE MAN OF YOUR HOUSE’. He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced: “From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and…

[Grif.Net readers have submitted more “I met a man . . . ” humor. Don’t blame me.] I met a man who needed to lose weight so he went to the hardware store to buy a gallon of thinner. I met a monkey who backed into a fan and cut…

Dante’s View and Our Choice By BOB HAYNES, Benton County (Arkansas) Daily Record In Death Valley, there is a place known as Dante’s View. From this location you can look down into the lowest spot in the United States, a depression in the earth 200 feet below sea level called…

I met a man who fell into an upholstery machine. Fortunately, he’s fully recovered now. I met a butcher who backed into the sausage grinder and got a little behind in his work. I met an optician who fell into the lens-grinding machine and made a spectacle of himself. I…

The Pope was finishing his Palm Sunday sermon. He ended it with the Latin phrase, “Tutti Homini” – Blessed be Mankind. A women’s rights group quickly complained to papal officials. They noticed that the pope blessed all Mankind, but not Womankind The next day, after His sermon, the Pope concluded…

January 1st: “My children and I will learn Hebrew this year.” April 1st: “My children and I will weekly eat one dozen bagels with lox.” January 1st: “I will get the kids the pet they’ve always wanted.” April 1st: “I will buy a collar and a leash for my chia…

Living in Wyoming, I loved the outdoors. Because of my passion for hunting and fishing, my family has always eaten a considerable amount of wild game. We eat so much wild game, in fact, that one evening as I set a platter of broiled venison steaks on the dinner table,…

Wife to Husband: “I think the Pastor is on a diet. He kept mumbling about being good low-carb Christians, and not partaking of the forbidden fruit.” Assistant Pastor to Pastor: “It was tough to keep their attention during the service, but you kept them awake. Many have yawned, but few…

“Walking down a path through some woods, I saw a water puddle ahead on the path. I angled my direction to go around it on the part of the path that wasn’t covered by water and mud. As I reached the puddle, I was suddenly attacked! “Yet I did nothing…