Grif.Net

A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said: “That’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen.” In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. I was seated next to her, and…

A policeman pulled a man over for speeding and asked him to get out of the car. After looking the man over he said, “Sir, I couldn’t help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?” The man grew really indignant and said, “Officer, I couldn’t help but…

A man and his wife were driving their recreational vehicle across the country and were nearing a town spelled Kissimmee. They noted the strange spelling and tried to figure how to pronounce it – KISS-a-me; kis-A-me; kis-a-ME. They grew more perplexed as they drove into the town. Since they were…

For those who are not aware: At all military base theaters, the National Anthem is played before the movie begins. This is written from a Chaplain in Iraq. I recently attended a showing of ‘Superman 3’ here at LSA Anaconda. We have a large auditorium we use for movies, as…

From an email by a friend. She writes: I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse started with certain basics. “How much do you weigh?” she asked. I said, “130.” The nurse put me on the scale. It turns out my weight is 185. The nurse asked,…

There was once a very influential farmer in a remote part of China, who had a problem. His chickens were losing their feathers and dying. He sought the counsel of the two wisest men in town – Hing, who was scientist, and Ming, who was a sorcerer. Hing, who has…

While crossing the US-Mexican border on his bicycle, a man was stopped by a guard who pointed to two sacks the man had on his shoulders. “What’s in the bags?” asked the guard. “Sand,” said the cyclist. “Get them off – we’ll take a look,” said the guard. The cyclist…

Every day a peddler pulled his cart of wool from his home to the village market. It was a long trip. He had to travel around the perimeter of a large lake that was owned by the town tycoon, a modern-day scrooge. One day during the winter the lake frozen…

I was out of the country when all this hoopla happened, and found out the Chicago did not get the Olympic bid in spite of both the President and First Lady making personal appeals. “To The Point News” had this funny bit of a “top ten list” 10. Dead people…

[A friend forwarded this touching story] I spent the week before my daughter’s June wedding running last minute trips to the caterer, florist, tuxedo shop, and the church about forty miles away. As happy as I was that Patsy was marrying a good Christian young man, I felt laden with…

An old codger was sitting on his porch this morning, enjoying his rocking chair on one of the last nice days of Autumn. A young man walked up with a pad and pencil in his hand and asked to come up on the porch. “Are you a day early for…

[Unless more “imponderables” that are far from the ordinary oft-repeated fare pop up in my mail box, this is the end. Maybe. When you put a sheet over your head for Halloween, are you a ghost or a mattress? What makes cheese so confidential that we actually need cheese shredders?…

[Another day, even MORE unanswerable questions] If you’re a kleptomaniac, is there something you can take for it? Is drilling for oil boring? Is the nose the scenter of the face? If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags? If a candle factory burns down, does everyone just stand…