Grif.Net

TOP 10 WORDS OF ADVICE 10. Never test the depth of the water with both feet 9. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie 8. Don’t bite the hand that looks dirty. 7. Consistency isn’t always good, especially if you’re consistently wrong 6. A penny saved is… not…

Celebrity Sells – I will list a product, company or even a phrase, and your job is to give a famous personality (or cartoon character) best associated with pitching the product Example: Beauty Mist Panty Hose = Joe Namath (NY Jets Quarterback) NOT SO DIFFICULT 1. His own brand of…

I walked into the post office one day and saw a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then took out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. Curiosity getting the better of…

[While there is some controversy over the author and all the advice he teaches about earthquakes, the basic information here might save a life. After the recent Haiti incident, I thought it worthwhile to share.] “My name is Doug Copp. I am the Rescue Chief and Disaster Manager of the…

A Saints fan was driving down by the bayou when he spotted a Colts fan walking along the road wearing a blue Manning jersey. In Louisiana, can you imagine? For fun, he swerved near him, veering away just in time. Though he was certain he had missed the guy, he…

An Indianapolis fan was enjoying himself at the game at the 2010 Super Bowl until he noticed an empty seat down in front. He went down and asked the guy next to it if he knew whose seat it was. The guy said, “Yes, that’s my wife’s seat. We never…

In order to save his marriage, a brilliant Saints fan who had married a slow-witted Colts fan agreed to undergo experimental brain surgery to lower his IQ so that he too can root for the Colts. After the procedure, as he was being wheeled into recovery, the surgeon went up…

During the Super Bowl, there was another football game of note between the big animals and the little animals. The big animals were crushing little animals and at half time, the coach made a passionate speech to rally the little animals. At the start of the second half the big…

The linebacker was helped by his teammates to the sideline. He yelled at the team physician, “Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something’s wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you’ll hear it!” The doctor cautiously placed his ear to the man’s thigh only to hear in a…

Serious subject caught my attention. Even though President Obama is against off shore drilling for our country (though that may change), he signed an executive order to loan $2,000,000,000 (two billion) of our taxpayers dollars to a Brazilian Oil Exploration Company (which is the 8th largest company in the entire…

[Bob J forwarded these very astute observations on growing older] ~Your kids are becoming you and you don’t like them, but your grandchildren are perfect! ~When people say you look “Great”, they always add “for your age!” ~The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15 and you have…

On a visit to Moscow I was required to take a tour of Lenin’s tomb. Was this a communist plot? I went to San Francisco. I found someone’s heart. Now what? Protons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic. Why do people say “close proximity”? Is there a…

Jim asked his friend, Tony, whether he had bought his wife anything for upcoming birthday. “Yes,” came the answer. “I’ve bought her both a belt and a bag to go with it.” “That was very kind of you,” Jim added, “I hope she appreciated the thought.” Tony smiled as he…