Grif.Net

“HE LEADETH ME” by John F. Chaplain In pastures green? Not always; sometimes He Who knows best, in kindness leads me by weary ways, where heavy shadows be. Out of the sunshine warm and soft and bright – Out of the sunshine into the darkest night, I oft would faint…

[ML asked me about this] Did you ever hear of Amoeba State Prison? It’s so small it only has one cell. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”

A pastor, known for his lengthy sermons, noticed a man get up and leave during the middle of his message. The man returned just before the conclusion of the service. Afterwards the pastor asked the man where he had gone. “I went to get a haircut,” was the reply. “But,”…

An old married couple was bickering a bit. He said “All men are born free and equal, but some of us got married and that’s our own fault.” This irritated his wife even more, so she quipped, “When we die and go to heaven, did you know we will no…

Joshie wasn’t getting good marks in school. One day he surprised the teacher with an announcement. He tapped her on the shoulder and said, “I don’t want to scare you, but my daddy says if I don’t start getting better grades, somebody is going to get a spanking!” ~~ The…

[Not a joke today. Had this cute gal in college 45 years ago who took the role of Elizabeth Barrett – with me taking the role of Robert Browning, of course – remind me of our “audition” poem and dialog . . and what it led to. Life has never…

Every February, across the country, candy, flowers, and gifts are exchanged between loved ones, all in the name of St. Valentine. But who is this mysterious saint and why do we celebrate this holiday? The history of Valentine’s Day — and its patron saint — is shrouded in mystery. But…

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: For those men still living in a cave and not knowing the time of year, you have only this weekend to get a Valentine card, flowers, chocolates or gift for that ‘special someone’. If you don’t, you may be living in a dog house. Do it NOW…

The irate customer calling the newspaper offices, loudly demanded to know where her Sunday edition was. “Ma’am”, said the employee, “today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered ’til Sunday.” There was quite a pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a ray of recognition. “Ah,…

Kudzu is green, my dog’s name is Blue And I’m so lucky to have a sweet thang like you. Yore hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze. Softer than Blue’s and with a lot fewer fleas. You move like the bass, which excite me in May. You ain’t got…

It was so cold . . . our grades seemed to be improving at school – when you apply the wind chill factor, a 57% looks like 93% It was so cold… my car wouldn’t run – but my nose wouldn’t stop! It was so cold… Smokey the Bear grabbed…

[From papers written by a second grade class] Grandparents are a lady and a man who have no little children of their own. They like other people’s kids. Grandparents don’t have to do anything except be there when we come to see them.. They are so old they shouldn’t play…

When Jesus came to Golgotha they hanged Him on a tree, They drove great nails through hands and feet, and made a Calvary; They crowned Him with a crown of thorns, red were His wounds and deep, For those were crude and cruel days, and human flesh was cheap. When…