Grif.Net

Many of you know that today I was supposed to be leaving for Vietnam and Cambodia on a ministry trip with my daughter, guided by Evangelist Tim Lee (a decorated Vietnam vet who left both legs behind). Because of circumstances beyond our control, the trip had to be postponed until…

On his vacation with the rich and famous, the President went to an elementary school on the island to talk to the kids (and to get much needed positive PR). After his talk he offered question time. One little boy put up his hand and he is asked his name.…

Up at the college today and heard a professor lecturing the incoming freshman class on using correct English. “In English a double negative forms a positive. In some languages, however, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. But there is no language in the world where a…

I visited my grandkids school for the parent orientation today. (Hey, it was free hot dogs so g’pa volunteered to go) The teacher asked whether anyone could remember the chemical formula for water Wanting to show my 4th and 2nd graders how smart I was, I said, “Sure, it’s HIJKLMNO.”…

Here is what I would LIKE the Boss to say about my ideas: **Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. Here is what the Boss would LIKE to say about my ideas: **I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant. **How about never? Is never…

Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and decided that, in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to share office space and personnel. Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist; they put up a sign reading: “Dr. Smith…

An old pastor lay dying. He sent a message for an Internal Revenue Service agent and his lawyer to come to the hospital. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his room. As they entered the room, the pastor held out his hands and motioned for them to sit…

Dear Lord, So far today, I am doing okay. I have not gossiped, lost my temper, or been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, and self-indulgent. I have not whined, complained, cursed, or eaten any chocolate. I have charged nothing on my credit card. I’ve not nagged at my husband or yelled…

A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed . . driving his partner nuts. Finally his exasperated friend said, “What’s taking so long? Hit the ball!” The fellow answered, “My wife is up…

Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. “So, how did you do, son?” he asked. “You’ll never believe it!” Billy said. “I was responsible for the winning run!” “Really?…

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