Grif.Net

Am I too old to be Trick-or-Treating? Asked myself . . Do I get out of breath knocking on the door? Do I need someone to chew the candy for me? Do I ask for high-fiber candy? Do I lose your balance if someone drops a candy bar in my…

“Domino vobiscum.” The pizza guy is here.) “Auda similarum ad seattles.” (They all sound just like Pearl Jam.) “Sharpei diem.” (Sieze the wrinkled dog.) “Nucleo predicus dispella conducticus.” (Remove foil before microwaving.) “Motorolus interruptus.” (Hold on, I’m going into a tunnel.) “Bodicus mutilatimus, unemploymi forevercus.” (Better take the nose ring…

My I.Q. Test came back negative. Last week, I went to a furniture store to look for a decaffeinated coffee table. After four decimal places, nobody cares. There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives. When camping at a public campground,…

Pastoral Search Report [forwarded by Bob W] We do not have a happy report to give. We have not been able to find a suitable candidate as a pastor for this church, though we have one promising prospect still. We do appreciate all the suggestions from the church members, and…

Hello, this is KGTC-FM. You are caller #9 and you’re on the air! ———– We’re sorry. You have reached an imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again. ———– WE ARE BORG. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED. But we’re not home right now. So leave…

[Actual answering machine answers recorded and verified by the world famous International Institute of Answering Machine Answers of Casper, Wyoming] “Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you didn’t…

[A female reader sent in this true story] While I was shopping in the mall with my three children, a display in the window of Victoria’s Secrets store caught my eye. “Do you think Daddy would like this?” I asked the kids, as I pointed to a lacy teddy with…

In a small town in the US, there is a rather sizable factory that hires only married men. Concerned about this, a local woman called on the manager and asked him, “Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you think women are weak, dumb,…

I’m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. All generalizations are false. We put the “k” in “kwality”. I owe, I owe, so off to work I go Contents may have settled out of court. Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have. I drive…

[This week’s editorial from the Casper Star-Tribune (Oct 14, 2012) Endorsement was spot-on with my sentiments and prayer for America. While our state is conservative, the paper has historically shown left-leaning as its owners are not from Wyoming. This article was insightful and refreshing.] Four years ago, Barack Obama promised…

The math teacher saw that little Joshie wasn’t paying attention in class. She called on him and said, “Joshie! What is 4, 2, 28 and 44?” He quickly replied, “NBC, CBS, HBO, and the Cartoon Network!” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”

A Preacher in a small town went to his church office last Monday morning and discovered a dead skunk in the church yard. He called the police. Since there did not appear to be any foul play, the police referred the Preacher to the health department. They said since there…

A Preacher in a small town went to his church office last Monday morning and discovered a dead skunk in the church yard. He called the police. Since there did not appear to be any foul play, the police referred the Preacher to the health department. They said since there…