Grif.Net

Sighing, the = history professor rapidly scanned the US History term paper on = "EARLY AMERICAN RAILWAYS" submitted by the class dunce.  = He determined almost at a glance that large portions had been lifted = verbatim and without attribution from Samuel Clemens’ "The = Gilded Age" and "Innocents =…

[My daughter who was born with the same = wanderlust as her father shared 10 MORE signs you are addicted to travel = – see grif.net 02/23/16 for part one]   11. You’re a proud charter member of the = Rick Steves fan club. 12. The Southwest Airlines agent says,…

I heard about the = kidnapping at the elementary school yesterday. Everything’s fine. He = woke up. I can’t eat = breakfast without a couple slices of wheat on the side because I’m = lack-toast intolerant. I want to stop buying = more clothes for fall, but I always end…

It’s hard to beat a boiled egg in the = morning. I used to eat either a = bagel or a doughnut every single day, but then I got tired of the hole = thing. A friend told me = he’s not happy with his butler with a missing left…

Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D. – = Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is an example of how this = condition manifests itself: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my = car and…

Once, a girl = bought an iPad. When her father saw it he asked, "What was the = first thing you did when you bought it?" His daughter = replied, "I put an anti-scratch sticker on the screen and bought a = cover for the iPad” "Did someone = force…

My grandson was asking about the cost = of food at the corner store when I was a kid. So I shared . . = . “When I was young, my mom could send me to a shop with a = single dollar bill and I would bring back five…

Question: = What is the biggest drawback to retirement? Answer: You = never get a day off.   Question: Why do retirees smile all = the time? Answer: = Because they can’t hear a word you’re = saying!    Question: When is a retiree’s = bedtime? Answer: = Three hours…

A woman came home to find her retired husband waving a rolled = up newspaper round his head. Wife: “What are you doing = dear?”   Husband: “Swatting flies. I got three males and two = females” Wife: “How = on earth do you know which gender they = were?”  Husband:…

Top Ten Tell-Tale signs of a “Travel = Addict” (more truth about ME and my daughter = Lyssa)   1. Your travel = ‘bucket list’ is now down to only 14 pages   2. Coming home is more like = a vacation from traveling   3. On your home-ward =…

A tramp knocked on the door of = an historic English pub known as “St. George and the = Dragon”. The landlady answered the door. “Could you = give a poor man something to eat?” asked the = beggar. “No!” yelled the = woman, slamming the door in his face.…

I hired a carpenter to help me restore = an old farmhouse.  After he had just finished a rough first day on = the job, a flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric saw = quit, and now his ancient pickup truck refused to start. While…

I heard Delta Airlines was infusing its = cabins with a lavender-and-chamomile scent called = “Calm”.  Here are = some names that might better match “the ambience of the packed = economy cabin.” “Eau the = Humanity” “Giorgio’s = Arm-on-me” “Chanel No. 5 Inches less = Legroom” “Claustrophobique” “Mist =…