Grif.Net

WM sent some possible signs you = may have a Weight Problem after the holidays.  Test yourself . . = .   10. Your favorite reading = materials are take-out menus. 9. Your Cross-fit training = starts as you CROSS your fingers and pray you FIT into your = jeans.…

Comparing the two rivals at Christmas . . . = Santa lives at the North = Pole … JESUS is = everywhere.   Santa = rides in a sleigh … JESUS rides = on the wind and walks on the water.   Santa = comes but once a year ……

This is the time of year when we think back to the = very first Christmas, when the Three Wise Men went to see baby Jesus, = and “presented unto Him gifts; gold, frankincense, and myrrh.”  = These are simple words, but if we analyze them carefully, we discover an…

A grandmother in a retirement high-rise was giving = directions to her grown grandson who was coming to visit for Christmas = with his wife:   "You come to the front door of the apartment = complex.  I am in apartment 14T. There is a big panel at the door. …

Time for some odd jokes for kids of all ages . . . =   Did you know that sending a letter to Santa Claus up = your chimney is definitely black mail?   Why should = you cover your eyes in ketchup?=A0 Because Heinz sight is = 20/20.  …

Admiring the = Christmas trees displayed in his neighbor’s windows, Nathan asked his = father, ‘Daddy, I know we’re Jewish but can’t we have a = Hanukkah Tree this year?’ ‘What sort of = question is that? No, of course not,’ said his = father. ‘Well, why not?’ = asked…

[What my friends are saying about their lives. Not. = Me.]   “Sometimes getting out of bed ruins the whole = day.”   “You know you have family issues at Christmas = when they all unfriend you on Facebook.”   “Give = up carbs?  Over my bread body.”   “If…

A man named Bob May, depressed and brokenhearted, = stared out his drafty apartment window into the chilling December = night.  His four-year-old daughter Barbara sat on his lap quietly = sobbing.  Bob’s wife/Barbara’s mother was dying of = cancer.   Little Barbara couldn’t understand why her mommy = could never…

Why did the cow run frantically across the = road? So she wouldn’t get creamed. ~~~ There = were these two cows, chatting over the fence between their fields. The = first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty = scary. They say it is spreading fast; I…

I grew up in a tough = inner city neighborhood. How tough? Not mentioning names, but a kid I = knew sat down to write a Christmas gift list to Jesus, rather than = Santa, to be sure it would be answered.   He first wrote, = ‘Dear Jesus, I…

DJT forwarded this = version of a “Christmas Songs” quiz to see if grif.net = readers can figure out what well-known Christmas songs these words are = describing.   1.  My sole desire for the yuletide = season is receipt of a pair of central incisors   2.  Celestial messengers…

[Want to know how we come up with our daily drivel? = Here are some co-workers we utilize]   Grif.Net = Complaint Line =3D Levon Hold   Grif.Net = Commencement Speaker =3D Gladys Overwith   Grif.Net = Transportation Specialist =3D Minnie Van Driver   Grif.Net = Sensitivity Trainer =3D Ophelia…

[Jokes for the = younger grif.net readers . . . but face it, most adults will groan just = as loudly as the kids]   What do you get from = a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.   What do you call a = cow with six inch legs? Ground beef.…