[Okay, I might = have been the one saying them] Statistically, = 9 out of 10 injections are in vein. Did you hear = about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right = now. I once heard a = joke about amnesia,…
08/07/18 Grif.Net – Jail
My grandson = took going to jail very badly. He refused all offers of food and drink. = Spit, kicked and swatted at anyone who came near him. Finally broke down = crying, and I think he may have even soiled his own = pants. Mark it = down. That…
08/06/18 Grif.Net – Random Thoughts on Eating
People = are lot less judgmental when you say you ate an ‘avocado salad’ instead = of a bowl of guacamole. My diet = always starts on a Monday morning and ends at the donuts somebody brings = into the office later that morning. I was = never…
08/04/18 Weekend Grif.Net – Inspiring Thoughts
Some years ago while traversing Prince Edward Island, I was blessed = to meet Bruce = MacNaughton. Since then, I get to enjoy his weekly blog and LOVE = inspiring thought he shares about life. Here is a = sampling: “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only…
08/03/18 Grif.Net – At the Doctor
I said, = “Doctor, every morning I when wake up and look in the mirror I = feel like throwing up. What’s wrong with = me”? He answered, = “I don’t know, Bob, but your eyesight is = perfect.” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] www.grif.net = "Jesus…
08/02/18 Grif.Net – Fairy Tale
[Random = fractured fairy tale ideas] As a child, the wicked magician always wanted to saw = people in half. Was he an only child? No, he had lots of half-brothers and = sisters Do you know what’s inside Aladdin’s = lamp? Me neither. It would take a…
08/01/18 Grif.Net – Monthly Offering
[First of the = month means another attempt and puntiful humor] Not sure that my = new tax accountant, Mr. Lou Pole, will get me out of trouble with this = IRS audit. When the = electrician arrived home at 3 a.m. his wife asked him, “Wire = You Insulate?”…
07/31/18 Grif.Net – Cruising for a Pun?
A musician who = joined an orchestra on a cruise ship was having difficulty keeping time = with the rest of the band. Finally, the = captain said, "Either you learn to keep time or I’ll throw you = overboard. It’s up to you, sync or swim." ~~ A…
07/30/18 Grif.Net – Home Again
[But the = cruise ship humor floats on] Odd questions = asked on board our ship and answers courtesy of the crew (if needed; = some are “duh” questions) Q: “Is = the water in my cabin’s toilet fresh water or sea = water?” A: [Room = Steward] “I…
07/28/18 Weekend Grif.Net – From the Heart of Joni Eareckson Tada
FROM = JONI’S DAILY RADIO BLOG (Feb 21, 2018) Suffering = provides the gym equipment on which your faith can be = exercised. Deny your = weakness, and you will never realize God’s strength in = you. Suffering is = the textbook that will teach you who…
07/27/18 Grif.Net – On Board, Next Cruise
A friend wrote a letter to a small Cruise Ship company on which he = planned to take a vacation. He wrote, ”I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He = is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me = to…
07/26/18 Grif.Net – Overheard on Board, New Hire
Steve was a = professional in his early 50’s, retired and decided to start a = second career. However, he just couldn’t seem to get to work on = time. Every day he was 5, 10, even 15 minutes late. However, he was a = good worker, really clever, so…
07/25/18 Grif.Net – Thoughts on Board, Cabin Trouble
There was some = mix-up with a woman’s cabin on board our ship. The Purser at = Reception was trying to remedy the situation. He offered her = a choice in to replace her original room: “Would you like an = inside cabin or an outside cabin?” She…