[Every summer we try to add to our = “it’s so hot” repertoire. Selected these for = this year’s heat wave. It has been 90F+ for 19 of the past = 21 days. Ugh.] It’s So Hot . . . I saw a chicken lay an = omelet It’s…
07/20/17 Grif.Net – Summertime (41)
[Overheard some word-plays in = my summertime travels and getting ready to pass them on to unsuspecting = grandkids] My company is better at = making suntan lotion than our competitors, but I don=1B$B!G=1B(Bt like = to rub it in. What did the air conditioning = unit say…
07/19/17 Grif.Net – Summertime (3)
It was at a miniature golf course on a = brutal 95F day in Florida that was overrun with tourists when I saw a = father with 3 kids making the rounds. "Who’s winning?" I asked = cheerfully. "I am" said one child. = "No, I am" said another.…
07/18/17 Grif.Net – Summertime (2)
A three-year-old scared his family = this summer by disappearing during a lakeside vacation. More than a = dozen friends and relatives searched the forest and shoreline, and = everyone was relieved when they found little Alex playing calmly in the = woods. "Listen to me, Alex," his mother said…
07/17/17 Grif.Net – Summer Time
[Preparing to see grandkids, so HAVE = to have some jokes for them!] Q: What did the pig say at the = beach on a hot summer’s day?A: I’m bacon! Q: What do you call = six weeks of rain in Scotland?A: Summer! Q: How do you = prevent a…
07/15/17 Weekend Grif.Net – Blame Game
Let’s see if I understand how America works lately = . . . If you burn your thighs on hot coffee you’re = holding in your lap while driving, you blame the restaurant. = If your teen-age son kills himself, you blame some = rock ‘n’ roll musician…
07/14/17 Grif.Net – Overheard in Church (5)
Our pastor preached one of his best sermons = ever last week. A lady in the congregation praised him highly and = suggested that he should publish a collection of his best = sermons. The preacher told her he was planning that = they be published posthumously. To…
07/13/17 Grif.Net – Overheard in Church (4)
Preacher: = “Can everyone hear me in the back?” Voice = from the back: “Yes, but I wouldn’t mind changing seats with = someone who can’t.” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] www.grif.net = "Jesus Knows Me, This I = Love!"
07/12/17 Grif.Net – Overheard in Church (3)
I’m not saying the preaching at our church is = boring, but the members voted to serve coffee after the sermon instead = of before. This is = to make sure members are fully awake before driving = home. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] www.grif.net = "Jesus…
07/11/17 Grif.Net – Overheard in Church (2)
I had just preached one of my top-drawer sermons, = and was met by a little old lady at the door who = shared: "You know Pastor, every sermon you preach is = better than your next one." Okay . = . . ~~ Dr Bob Griffin…
07/10/17 Grif.Net – Overheard Last Sunday (1)
In the children’s sermon I said, ‘We have = been learning how powerful Kings and Queens were in Bible times. But, = there is a Higher Power. Can anybody tell me what it = is?’ One child blurted out, ‘Aces!’ ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] www.grif.net =…
07/08/17 Weekend Grif.Net – Don’t Widen the Plate
Twenty One years ago, in = Nashville, Tennessee, during the first week of January,1996, more than = 4,000 baseball coaches descended upon the Opryland Hotel for the 52nd = annual ABCA’s convention. While I waited in line to register with = the hotel staff, I heard other more veteran coaches…
07/07/17 Grif.Net – What My Friends Are Saying
[Social Media posts from my = cyber-friends tells me more about them than they = think] Looking at diet books and thinking, ‘What a waste of a = tree.’ Don’t tell me the sky’s the limit when there are footprints on = the moon. Food is an…