Grif.Net

Have the last four of my grandchildren here visiting this summer, so thought I’d share some jokes about their Grandpa’s life. Next Up = Work Boss: “Did you mail out those circulars?” Bob: “No, I couldn’t find any round envelopes.” HR Director: “Don’t you think that this company is like…

Have the last four of my grandchildren en route to visit this summer, so thought I’d share some stories about their Grandpa’s life. Next Up = Driving Policeman: “Say, didn’t you see that red light?” Bob: “Oh, yeah, but when you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.” Policeman: “Sir, your…

Have the last four of my grandchildren en route to visit this summer, so thought I’d share some stories about their Grandpa’s life. First up = School. Teacher: “Are the questions on this test giving you trouble?” Bobby: No. “The questions are clear. It’s the answers.” Teacher: “Name a collective…

A minister passing through his church in the middle of the day, Decided to pause by the altar and see who had come to pray. Just then the back door opened, a man came down the aisle, The minister frowned as he saw the man hadn’t shaved in awhile. His…

[Dave suggested some “bad pun on the month” candidates] I went to a seafood disco last week…and pulled a mussel. A man walked into a restaurant with a slab of asphalt under his arm and said, “I’d like a drink please, and one for the road.” Two cannibals are eating…

His request approved, the photographer used a cell phone to call the local airport to charter a flight. He was told a twin engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport. Arriving at the airfield, he spotted a plane warming up outside a hanger. He jumped in with…

Dewey goes to the local revival and listens to the preacher. After a while the preacher asks anyone with needs to be prayed over to come forward to the front at the altar. Dewey gets in line, and when it’s his turn the preacher asks: “Dewey, what do you want…

Young Chuck moved to Montana and bought a horse from a farmer for $100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day. The next day he drove up and said, ‘Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died.’ Chuck replied, ‘Well, then just give me…

A farmer had been ‘taken’ by the fine print several times by a local car dealer.  One day, the car dealer informed the farmer that he was = coming over to purchase a cow.  The farmer priced his unit as = follows:   Basic cow           &nbs= p;           &nbsp= ;            =      999.95 Handling      &n=…

I was concerned about America when George W Bush was elected President. Not sure he could do the job. Then 9.11 happened and we were attacked. He stood up against terrorism and I’ve appreciated that. And the economy seemed fairly stable. America weathered the storm But in the mid-term elections…

It seems that many Grif.Net messages (sent to nearly 5000 of my closest fiends) raise some response. Laughalot (from an unknown source) used this parody of what controversy might be raised with a simple question: Q: How many GRIF.NET mail list subscribers does it take to change a light bulb?…

Ted and Marsha were a young couple preparing for their wedding day. The bride-to-be was obviously stressed out and the sensitive future groom offered to help her with some of the arrangements. Marsha suggested that Ted handle the ordering of the wedding cake. There was a Scripture verse that was…

[Try to get a sense of the mindset of this year’s incoming freshmen. The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1990] They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up. Their lifetime has always included AIDS. Bottle caps have always been…