Grif.Net

[Mike forwarded this new Christmas classic carol. And yes, he’s Norwegian] If Jesus had been a Norwegian, Things would be so different today. Instead of Matthew, Mark and Luke and John, We’d have Sven and Lars and Ole. Walking on the water Would be no special trick, ‘Cause all over…

A 4-year-old boy was asked to give the meal blessing before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his…

Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents the week before Christmas. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his voice. “I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE… I PRAY FOR A NEW…

Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker were having one of their little father-and-son chats with light-sabers drawn and sparks flying. Vader pinned Luke against a bulkhead and glared into his face, “I know what you’re getting for Christmas, Luke,” he said. “Oh, yes, I know!” Luke fought himself free and jumped…

“For God has shined in our hearts, to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God. But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, in order that the excellence of the power may be of God, and not of us.” II Corinthians 4:6-7 Some years ago,…

Shorthanded at the clinic this week so I had to work three days. Always a fun time to meet new and old friends. And telling them all about our Christmas specials and how to receive valuable gifts (with a minimum purchase, of course) is great. But one dear lady left…

I know a Wyoming rancher who has 200 head of cattle. He thought there were only 196 until he rounded them up. I burned my tongue eating the gourmet food. Obviously, it was hot cuisine. He made money sending thousands of junk emails to people, but one day he made…

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? If a bear takes over Disneyland, is it a pooh d’état? If I tell jokes about other religions can I be put on the Sects Offenders List? If it weren’t for Venetian blinds would it be curtains for everybody? Is having…

I asked a friend if he knew his wife’s favorite flower. I recognized his marriage was in trouble when he said, I think it is Pillsbury Self-Rising”. Harvey up the road sent me some ‘Flower Riddles’ (answers are names of flowers) and some are hard. Here’s a baker’s dozen .…

Dear God, My only prayer at Christmas is for a fat bank account and a thin body. And Lord, please don’t mix these up like You did last year. Amen. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”

Count your blessings instead of your crosses; Count your gains instead of your losses. Count your joys instead of your woes; Count your friends instead of your foes. Count your smiles instead of your tears; Count your courage instead of your fears. Count your full years instead of your lean;…

6. Fact or Fiction: Native Americans used cranberries, now a staple of many Thanksgiving dinners, for cooking as well as medicinal purposes. Fact. According to the Cape Cod Cranberry Growers’ Association, one of the country’s oldest farmers’ organizations, Native Americans used cranberries in a variety of foods, including “pemmican” (a…

[A favorite website (history.com) has ten questions for this special day. We will share five today and five tomorrow] 1. Fact or Fiction: Thanksgiving is held on the final Thursday of November each year. Fiction. In 1863, President Abraham Lincoln designated the last Thursday in November as a national day…