o Impotent. . . . . . . . . . . Distinguished, well known o Inbred. . . . . . . . . . . . Best way to eat salami o Labor Pain. . . . . . . . . . Getting hurt at work o…
06/06/12 Grif.Net Blog – Medical Glossary (part 1)
BACKWOODS GLOSSARY OF MEDICAL TERMS o Alimentary. . . . . . . . . . What Holmes said to Watson o Artery. . . . . . . . . . . . Study of Painting o Bacteria. . . . . . . . . . . Back…
06/05/12 Grif.Net Blog – Quick Witted Lad
An older gentleman in a Safeway Store in Wyoming tried to buy half a head of lettuce. The very young produce assistant told him that they sell only whole heads of lettuce. The man persisted and asked to see the manager. The teen said he’d ask his manager about it.…
06/04/12 Grif.Net Blog – Reaction to Friday’s Puns
“Dr Bob, Please remember that a pun at maturity is fully groan.” Okay. I get it. You didn’t like ’em all. So here’s a mulligan, another try at a memorable word play. There once was a young Puritan man, who had a great deal of difficulty remembering the various rules…
06/02/12 Weekend Grif.Net Blog – Mother Earned Her Wrinkles
Mother Earned Her Wrinkles borrowed from Erma Bombeck According to her height and weight on the insurance charts, she should be a guard for the Los Angeles Lakers. She has iron-starved blood, one shoulder is lower than the other, and she bites her fingernails. She is the most beautiful woman…
06/01/12 Grif.Net Blog – June Puns and Wordplays
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t seem to put it down. They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a type-O. England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool. Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too. I was asked if I…
05/31/12 Grif.Net – Recent Experiences
Busy month so checkin’ my diary. In May . . I stopped by the BMW dealer’s, but I left quickly when I saw the prices! It was a near-debt experience. I wanted to say “Beamer up, Scotty.” I read the classic book about paying alimony. It was called “The Bounty…
05/30/12 Grif.Net – More ‘Did You Know’ Factoids
Did you know that in Japanese, tofu translates roughly as ‘whale snot’? Did you know in Wyoming we do not cultured oil anywhere? It is all crude oil. Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans. Did you know that fear of meeting a fat man in…
05/29/12 Grif.Net – How Much
[Thanks to Jack for the humor forward] One evening after dinner, I asked my six-year-old, “How much do you love me?” “A million dollars,” he replied. “Is that all?” I responded, with a grin. “I love you ALL the dollars,” my son said. So I asked, “What about the guilders?”…
05/28/12 Grif.Net – Reasons to Enlist in the Military
[Some wonder what are some good reasons to enlist. On this Memorial Day holiday, I share explanations from many in the armed forces] You should enlist in the military if . . . . . you’ve ever asked WWWDWOA? (what would we do without acronyms?) . . you enjoy being…
05/26/12 Memorial Weekend Grif.Net – Psalm for our Service Members
PSALM 20 May the Lord answer you in the day of trouble! May the name of the God of Jacob set you securely on high! May He send you help from the sanctuary, and support you from Zion! May He remember all your meal offerings, and find your burnt offerings…
05/25/12 Grif.Net – More Questions without Answers
[Lots of “questions” or “ponderables” floating on the ‘net. Some funny. But interested to see some newer ones from time to time.] Do chickens think rubber humans are funny? Do Roman paramedics refer to IV’s as “4s”? Do those poker playing dogs own paintings of humans playing “fetch”? Does distressed…
05/24/12 Grif.Net – Term Paper Due
Dad asked his teenaged son, “It’s May 24th and just a couple weeks left of school. How’s that big history paper coming?” His son replied with a smile, “Well, my teacher suggested that I use the internet for research, and it’s been very helpful. The paper is almost done!” “Really?”…