Grif.Net

Here is a mid-week quiz that is truly surprising. As the first (mother-tongue) of people in the world, what language are spoken by the most people? I am too kind, I know, but I will give you the estimated NUMBER of people who speak that language AND the first LETTER…

In a barbershop in Wyoming the television on the wall was sharing Headline News. A tourist walked in just as President Obama came on TV to blame the Republicans for the mess this country is in. After looking at the screen for a minute, he mumbled, “Now there’s the biggest…

[Bob shared this and it made me smile. So passing it along.] Schwartz is dying and is on his deathbed. He is with his nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, and knows the end is near. So he says to them: “Bernie, I want you to take the…

As a boy I remember my mother quoting this poem to us children. She wanted us learn its lesson to live wisely each day, as life would pass so quickly and we could never go back. I wish I had learned it’s message back then. Sarah Doudney wrote this when…

[Last month’s “great come-back” made me remember another “great” one from an interview with the late General Norman Schwarzkopf] The General was asked if he thought there was room for forgiveness toward the people who have harbored and abetted the terrorists who perpetrated the 9/11 attacks on America. The General…

A little quiz on some famous authors who wrote using pen names. I will give the AUTHOR and you simply have to give the well-known PEN NAME under which he/she wrote. I will give letter-spacing as clues to help you because hey, I have the answers and you don’t. Ha.…

[Now, Teresa doesn’t have a FaceBook account. She spends hours on the computer at her clinic working and doesn’t have any desire to waste precious free time on such trivialities. So I thought I’d post some of her “status updates” for her. You’re welcome, dear.] “The first 50 years of…

[Monthly assortment of truly lousy word play and puns] With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress. He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key. Every calendar’s days are numbered. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. Those who get too…

If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer’s credibility. Q: ‘Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?’…

[LZ in Wisconsin suggested this story for a weekend Grif.Net] I hired a plumber to help me restore an old farmhouse, and after he had just finished a rough first day on the job: a flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric drill quit and his…

According to the Collegiate Licensing Company here are the top ten US colleges/universities in SALES OF MERCHANDISE with their logo or name on it. Your job, if you are willing to try, is to put the TOP FIVE IN ORDER. And sadly, my beloved Badgers of Wisconsin are missing from…

“Today is the first day of the rest of your life, but so was yesterday, and look how that turned out.” “I said I have a can-do attitude. I never said I had a will-do attitude.” “If practice makes perfect, and nobody’s perfect, why practice?” “My wife is going to…

[This is a very old joke, yet every time I think about it, I smile. You will, too.] There was a duck who walked into a store and asked, “Got any candy?” The storekeeper said, “No, we don’t.” The next day, the duck went into the same store and asked…