Grif.Net

[This email is brought to you by Apple’s latest product, the iPun.] At a recent concert: “Please remain in your seat until the playin’ has come to a complete stop.” A gossip is someone with a sense of rumor. Marriage is the mourning after the knot before. After hearing the…

‘Be of good comfort, Master Ridley, and play the man. We shall this day light such a candle, by God’s grace, in England, as I trust shall never be put out.’ These courageous words from the mouth of Bishop Latimer have reverberated down the centuries, a clarion call of the…

[Yesterday’s Grif.Net Blog about the worker at the mini-mart brought a busload of responses. Here are a couple of examples.] My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the individual behind the counter for “minimal lettuce.” He said. “I’m sorry, but we only have…

Yesterday I needed gas so zipped to a local convenience store. As I pumped I noticed a sign in the window advertising their “store brand” of soda pop on sale: “XX Cola 49 cents. Two for a dollar.” What a deal! I thought. So I went in to pay for…

MID-WEEK QUIZ TIME AGAIN! And this time I am making it easy-peasy so all can ‘feel the love’. I will give a list of fictional men and your task is to match them with their ‘true love’. Example: Tom Sawyer + ______________ (answer: Becky Thatcher) ____________ 1. Westley ____________ 2.…

The Pope met with his Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Benjamin Netanyahu, the leader of Israel. “Your Holiness “, said one of his Cardinals, “Mr. Netanyahu wants to challenge you to a game of golf to show the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Jewish and Catholic faiths.”…

We tend to be myopic, thinking only of self and personal interest. Consider these facts from another perspective: *From a clock’s point of view, the hands move counterclockwise. *From a chicken’s point of view, every egg you eat is poached. *From the sun’s point of view, it never rises on…

When I was in the fifth grade, my classmates and I were not doing so well in geography, and we expected a major reprimand. Instead, the teacher brought to class a large wooden puzzle of the United States. He never said a word about it; he just placed it on…

[Always fun to examine the FaceBook and Twitter ‘status update’ of friends. Some seem to be having a rough winter.] ~ The other day I saw a sign in the restroom that said: “Employees Must Wash Hands Before Returning to Work”. I waited for an hour and NO EMPLOYEES CAME!…

[Does your church get extra income from new corporate sponsors? Hmmm.] 10. Nike “swoosh” on the cross 9. Communion cups have Welch’s Grape Juice logo 8. Bulletin has coupon section for after-church dinner specials 7. In Christmas play, Joseph seen with a hair done by Vidal Sassoon 6. Greeters all…

Midweek Quiz Time! Last week we gave an “easy” quiz and many asked for MORE CHALLENGING number/letter statements. Remember, each contains the initials of words + numbers of well-known phrases. You must uncover the meaning of the clues. NO GOOGLE, PLEASE. Example: 13 S on the A F = 13…

Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off. A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, “What was the problem?” “The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine,” explained the Flight Attendant,…

Jim asked Randy if he’d gotten his wife anything for Valentine’s Day. Randy said, “Yes I did. I bought her both a new bag and a belt.” Jim was shocked, “Really? That was very kind of you. I’m sure she will appreciate those.” Randy replied, “I hope she appreciates them,…