Grif.Net

This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ——=_NextPart_000_02A4_01D0166E.F90A2670 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary=”—-=_NextPart_001_02A5_01D0166E.F90A2670″ ——=_NextPart_001_02A5_01D0166E.F90A2670 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=”us-ascii” Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Yes, I’m sending 12 PUNS of Christmas, but this is a serious weekend edition on 12 Bible passages to read for Christmas. Dare you. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus Knows…

When calling Dominoes Pizza at Christmas, the caller asked for a pizza cooked the King Wenceslaus style. Having never heard of such, the worker asked exactly what that entailed. He was told such a pizza could have any combination of toppings, but must be deep pan, crisp and even. ~~…

We heard that the San Francisco 49’ers were upset in their loss to Oakland Sunday. They signed Ebenezer Scrooge and his spirit friends to be the new quarterback and throw some touchdowns. Evidently they read that the ghost of Christmas passed. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus Knows Me,…

Heard about the fracas in a hotel lobby when a bunch of grandmasters of chess were arguing about who was the best player? Manager had to kick them out. Obvious trouble when you have chess nuts boasting in an open foyer. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus Knows Me,…

The first Christmas there were actually FOUR kings who came from the East searching for the baby Jesus. They were named Why, What, Where, and a fourth king, Whence. Along the way, Whence (with no GPS?) took a wrong turn on his camel, separated from the caravan, and was never…

[Thought that over the next 12 weekdays we would share some wonderful puns and word plays of the Christmas season. Some might be good ones, but don’t hold your breath. Thinking of starting a Christmas humor website – Oh.com/all_ye_faithful] Here are some random thoughts to get us all smiling and…

The barracks where Corrie ten Boom and her sister Betsy were kept in the Ravensbruck Nazi concentration camp were terribly overcrowded and flea-infested. They had been able to miraculously smuggle a Bible into the camp, and in that Bible they had read that in all things they were to give…

Very early one morning two birds were sitting at the side of a large puddle of oil near Newark, New Jersey. They spotted a worm on the other side. So one flew over the water, while the other one swam through. Which one got to the worm first? The one…

Two students, Robert and James, were taking the same test in class. Both had the same grade for the Fall Term, and this test would determine who had the college’s highest G.P.A. for the semester. Each of them missed only one of the questions. The prof went to Robert and…

Bill went to see Jennifer, a local chiropractor, though he thought privately that they were all ‘quacks’ and that she wouldn’t be able to help his chronic back pain. But after a few minutes, his back felt like new. When the doctor asked, “Well, how do you feel about chiropractors…

Between Thanksgiving and Christmas there was an escalation of absences from the university’s contract-law class taught by Professor Fiddler. Finally the professor asked his teaching assistant to issue a strong warning regarding the consequences of such truancies. When the class convened for its next session, these words were found on…

Oxygen and Potassium went on a date. Evidently it went OK. Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong started a restaurant on the moon. They said the food was great, but the place had no atmosphere. If you buy a particular sandwich cookie and don’t mention it, then it may be an…

For all the negative things we have to think or say, God has a positive truth in His Word to “correct” our thinking. We say, “It’s impossible.” GOD says, All things are possible. (Luke 18:27) We say, “I’m too tired.” GOD says, I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28-30) We…