Grif.Net

[Advice culled from my experiences of being happily = married for nearly 3 years. Which is not bad, since I’ve been married 46 = years]   *There are two ways to handle a woman. Nobody knows = either of them.   *Never = argue with your wife when she’s tired…

[Rebecca forwarded these timely = reminders for living]   **Your shoes are the first thing = people subconsciously notice about you. Wear nice shoes.      &nbs= p; **A person’s height is determined = by their father, and their weight is determined by their = mother.   **If a part of your…

TOP 10 SIGNS YOU’RE NOT READING YOUR BIBLE = ENOUGH –10 The Preacher announces the sermon is from = Galatians … and you check the table of contents. –9 You think Abraham, Isaac and Jacob may have = had a few hit songs during the 60’s. –8 You open to…

If everyone in the world joined hands around the = Equator, wouldn’t most of them drown?   If a = Buddhist ordered a hot dog, would he ask for “one with = everything”?   If corn oil = is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then…

THE HANDWRITING ON THE = WALL A weary mother returned from = the storeLugging groceries through the kitchen door.Awaiting her = arrival was her eight-year-old sonAnxious to relate what his younger = brother had done. "While I was out playing and Dad was on a = callT.J. took his crayons…

[Here are a couple more “Top = Jokes” according to a magazine survey.  And trust me, THESE = are the “best”.  Ugh.  Most were not every worthy = of a grimace.]   When Susan’s boyfriend proposed marriage = to her she said: ”I love the simple things in life, but…

[In 2010 a survey was taken by a large = British magazine for the “Top Jokes/Gags” of all time.  = Here is a sampling of their ‘best’, of which I found only a = couple to actually be ‘funny’.] A woman gets on a bus = with her baby. The…

What is the difference between = a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a = bicycle?  Attire.   ~~ What is the difference = between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy and = the other is a little lighter.   ~~ What’s…

T= wo Minnesotans from Duluth were walking down the street in Chetek, = Wisconsin, when they saw a sign on a store that read, "Suits $5.00 = each, shirts $2.00 each, and trousers $2.50 per = pair." O= le says to his pal, "Looky here!  Ve could buy a whole…

When I was a little kid learning English, my grammar = told me that double negatives were a no-no.   I saw a lone = horse in a lush pasture and thought to myself he must be having a field = day.   Will glass coffins be a success? Remains…

[Testimony from the book = Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow]   I paced back and forth as = I waited for my Polish sister-in-Christ to arrive.  I was nervous = because her family had never had even a small apartment there.  I = had visited Eva-With-No-Home in her…

The parents of a Northwestern student who had just = headed back from semester break received this letter:   Dear = Mom and Dad: Univer$ity life i$ $o = wonderful! Cla$$e$ this $e$$ion are intere$ting, my cla$$mate$ are the = be$t! But after $pending all my = ca$h on Chri$tma$…

Because it wasn’t good for Adam to be left alone, = God came down to share His new plan.  "Adam, I have a plan = that will make you very happy. I’m going to take away part of your body, = and from it make you a companion that will…