Grif.Net

[Over= heard some old codgers at the coffee shop chatting] “When I wa= s a boy, you could walk into a grocery store with two dollars in your pocke= t and walk out with a loaf of bread, a dozen eggs, milk, and a jar of peanu= t butter. Now…

>I= f a cop pulls over a U-Haul truck, did he bust a move? &= nbsp; >Since parallel lines have so much in common, isn=E2=80= =99t it sad they will never meet?   >Di= d you know that they aren=E2=80=99t going to make yard sticks any longer?   >If you…

[Many know all the =E2=80=9Csigns=E2=80=9D we use in keyboardin= g, editing, punctuation, commerce, technology, or even simple writing, but = some may not remember the official NAME of these signs. You may know a =E2= =80=9Cslang=E2=80=9D term (like =E2=80=9Chashtag=E2=80=9D) but not the prop= er name. Test your knowledge of the…

[Toda= y is my wife’s birthday. I promised NOT to tell how old she is, but s= he is “double lucky”, rolling two 7’s. Of course, that me= ans some really loving (lame) jokes are on tap to remind us about getting o= lder!.]   You know you are old…

On the street of a small British town a couple hours from Londo= n, an old man met a younger fellow who asked him, “Do you remember me= ?”   The older replied, “Sorry. No”. So, the young man reminded h= im that he was a former student at the…

[Many= foreigners continue to wonder about what American phrases or words actuall= y mean. I tell them that WE don’t usually know, either.] = 1. ‘Entr=E9e’ means beginning unless it&#= 8217;s now the main course which is later.   2. ‘I cannot put my finger on it’ but you can &#82=…

[What= sounds normal and logical to us may not be to others. Don’t kick the= can down the road. Evaluate what you say carefully.] 1. ‘it’s a piece of cake’ isn’t talkin= g about a piece of cake. &nb= sp; 2. ’Working the graveyard shift’ doesn’= t mean you have a job…

A youngster was on her first airplane flight and to say she was= “excited” was an understatement. She peeked in the cockpit as = she entered the plane, found the seat where she and her mother were to be l= ocated. Her mother asked her to put her backpack in…

This is a multipart message in MIME format. ——=_NextPart_000_032A_01DBB368.EB2CE400 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=”us-ascii” Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit [Famous quotations are well known. Sadly, we often forget the original speaker/writer or context in which they were given. How many of these wise and pithy sayings can you correctly attribute?] 1. “Don’t find fault, find…

[Befo= re we get to a real quiz tomorrow, thought we’d ask some fun question= s today.  Smile.] “Dad, can you please explain to me what= a solar eclipse is?” “No sun."   What kind of music does a boulder like? Rock ‘n’ roll.   What do sp= rinters eat…

Presi= dent Trump’s message for Holy Week:   “This Holy Week, Melania and I join in prayer with Christians cele= brating the crucifixion and resurrection of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Chri= st—the living Son of God who conquered death, freed us from sin, and = unlocked the gates of…

When = is it best to wash your Slinky? Any time during spring cleani= ng   Why are florists so happy in the spri= ngtime? Because business is blooming &nbs= p; Do bees fly when it rains? Yes, but before they = go out, they put on their yellow jackets.…

[Whil= e many schools took a break from studies earlier in the spring, some wait u= ntil Easter week to enjoy the holiday. Hope everyone can enjoy this light-h= earted humor.]   Where did the orca go for= Easter Vacation? Wales   H= ow does the ocean say bye at…