Grif.Net

(Amidst our prayers and seriousness of Elect= ion Day, we bring a little light-hearted humor to mind) Q. How do yo= u stop Canadian bacon from curling in the pan? A. You take away its tiny broom.   Q. What are the four keys to success? A. S, U, C,…

A group of tourists was visiting a crocodile farm, and they wer= e in a floating structure in the middle of a crocodile lake. The owner of t= he farm shouted: "Whoever jumps into the water and swims to shore will= receive a ten-thousand-dollar prize!! =   The silence was…

[The first weekend of each month is a time to encourage and ins= pire our blog readers to greater achievement and aspiration.] &#8220= ;If your dreams don’t scare you, they are too small.” ~ Richard Branson   “It is wise to keep in mind that ne= ither success nor failure…

[Couple of stories to start out November wit= h PUNishing humor. Like starting every month hearing groans from around the= world!]   “I can’t wait to set the clo= cks back this weekend, and get an extra hour of unable to sleep.”   = ~~ “I just got a job…

Do not put statements in the negative form.   And don’t start = sentences with a conjunction. =  = If you reread your work, you will find on rer= eading that a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and edit= ing.   Never use a long word…

Thank God for Fall and the first hard freeze.  Taking c= are of a lawn must be the stupidest thing we’ve come up with in a long time= ! We constantly battle dandelions, Queen Anne’s lace, thistle, violets, chi= cory, and clover that thrive naturally, so we can grow grass…

There are idiots walking among us: ** I was signing t= he receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had ne= ver signed my name on the back of the credit card.  She informed me th= at she could not complete the transaction unless the…

As a new bride, Aunt Edna moved into the small home on her h= usband’s ranch in Wyoming.  She put a shoebox on a shelf in her closet= and asked her husband never to touch it.   For fifty years, Uncle Jack left = the box alone, until Aunt Edna…

Came across a disturbing statistic. Thought about making it a &= #8220;quiz” last Tuesday, but this was just so important for everyone= to see and understand the significance that might be lost otherwise.   = In 2024 on = average, there are 170,790 people in this world who will die…

[Every 25 years on the Grif Net we try to update our definit= ions on Football as applied to the Church. Here is the revision from our Fa= ll 1999 version.]   Halftime – The period between Sunday School and Morning = worship when many choose to leave. &= nbsp;…

[Final funny questions and answers for the whole family to join= in picking up stones and chase after me!!] Q: Why was Paul the firs= t surfer in the Bible?A: In Acts we are told after his shipwreck in the= Mediterranean Sea, he "came ashore on a board". Q: Why…

[More lame riddles/jokes to make the family roll their eyes in = unison.]   Q: What was the first game in the Bible?A: Baseball: Genesis 1:1 sta= rts, “In the big inning”.Eve stole first and Adam stole sec= ond. They both were put out Cain struck = out Abel The…

[In place of our regular weekly quiz, we’ll provide a few= days of FUNNY (and lame) jokes about Bible history. Enjoy the groans of th= e whole family with these old lines.] Q: Where does the Bible teach = that men should clean up the kitchen after a meal?A: II Kings…