Grif.Net

From nearly = one hundred years ago, could you name the   1. President = of the largest steel company?2. President of the largest = gas-electric utility company?3. Principal broker for J.P. Morgan = & Co., and soon to be president of the New York Stock = Exchange?4. Greatest grain-market…

Ad in a local paper: FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $500.00 or best offer No longer needed   [Got married last weekend. Found out wife knows = everything] = ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] = www.grif.net "Jesus = Knows Me, This…

**If Satan goes bald, will there be Hell = toupee?   **Since = according to Greek mythology, Chiron was half horse and half human = doctor, does this make him the Centaur for Disease = Control?   **Do I need a = current license to drive an electric car?  …

A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house of Mr. = Smith. As he delivered the pizza, Mr. Smith asked: "What’s = the usual tip?"   "Well," replied the youth, "this is my = first trip here, but the other guys at work say if I get a quarter…

[Celebrating the anniversary of the end of World War II = yesterday brought to mind some valuable adages of various service = branches] "If the enemy is in range, so are you." – = Infantry Journal   “It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over = the area you just…

Why are some = sports fast and others dull? Every football game has a kick-off.  = Basketball games have jump starts. Baseball has a first pitch.  But = soccer games start with a kick backwards.   A semi-col= on broke the law and was given two consecutive = sentences   I…

[Adapted from = “7 Habits of Highly Effective = People”]   Once upon a = time, a very strong woodcutter asked for a job in a timber merchant and = he got it. The pay was really good and so was the work condition. For = those reasons, the woodcutter…

At the height of another Chicago political corruption = trial, the U.S. Attorney attacked a witness. "Isn’t it true," = he bellowed, "that you accepted fifty thousand dollars to = compromise this case?"   The witness stared out the courtroom window, as though = he hadn’t heard the question.  …

**Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk = ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just = pretty much leave me alone.   **The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan = belt or…

Grandpa to 3 grandkids sitting in front of TV:  = “What are you kids doing sitting inside on such a beautiful summer = day?  Watching TV?  Didn’t I tell you that when I was = your age, you wouldn’t find me sitting around wasting the last = days of summer…

[All the = summer interns are gone. Here are MORE evaluations of crop failure in = our future worker pool]   She’s as = bright as Alaska in December.   One-celled = organisms out-score her in IQ tests.   Donated his = brain to science before he was done using…

[Evaluation of = our company’s employees as they left their summer job with us to = return to university. Names removed to protect any minimal hope they may = have of future employment] His co-workers would follow him = anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.   I would not…

Sometimes = people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant = to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to = help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never = know…