Grif.Net

[In Japan, computers have replaced the impersonal = and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with their own Japanese haiku = poetry. So how would that work in English?  Each only 17 = syllables. Actually “sounds” like a computer, = eh?]   A file that big? It might be very useful. But…

Wayne asked Mary, "Honey, what do you like most about = me–my rippling muscles, my winsome personality or my handsome = face?"Mary chuckled and answered, = "Your sense of humor!"   Mary called me yesterday, and when I answered, she said, = "Knock, knock!"I don’t like "Knock, = knock" jokes,…

[Friends and = former friends so enjoyed the three days of lame “Dad Jokes” = back a few weeks ago, that they sent us a few more. I added some of my = own, too. Any you laugh at are mine. (That’s a = joke).]   I like telling =…

After the = holidays, Tonya Z pleaded: “Alexa, delete my = belly”   Jenna related = her story: “I asked me husband just to take the spider out and not = kill it.  He returned after taking the spider out and evidently had = a few drinks.  He told me…

[From a = medical missionary in Africa]   One night I = had worked hard to help a mother in the labor ward; but in spite of all = we could do she died leaving us with a tiny premature baby and  a = crying two-year-old daughter. We would have…

Ole is on his = deathbed and whispers to Lena, “Is everyone gathered here in the = bedroom?”   Lena looks = around and assures him, “Yes, dear. Ole Jr and Christina, your = fishin’ buddy Sven, your brother Karl, Aunt Lottie, even your = cousin Halmar – we’re all…

Ole, on his = deathbed, said to Lena, “Forty-eight years we’ve been = married. You’ve stuck with me through it all. = . . The = tornado that blew our house down. . . The years = the crops failed. . . The time = all the pigs died. .…

Ole is on his death bed and says to Lena, sitting there = beside him, “When I die I want you to marry = Sven.” Lena looked surprised. “I = thought you hated Sven.” Ole replies, “I do.”   ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] = www.grif.net "Jesus = Knows…

Ole died. So = Lena went to the local paper to put a notice in the obituaries. The = gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences, asked Lena = what she would like to say about Ole.   Lena replied, = "Just put two words: ‘Ole died’."   The…

O= le went to the doctor for a physical. After Ole was dressed the doctor = came in and said, "I’m sorry Ole, but you are very sick and have = only a few weeks to live."   O= le went home with a heavy heart to tell Lena the…

Just months after winning his 1941 Academy Award for best = actor in “The Philadelphia Story,” Jimmy Stewart, one of the = best-known actors of the day, left Hollywood and joined the US Army. He = was the first big-name movie star to enlist in World War II. An accomplished…

[Repeat from January 2000 Grif Net Blog by = request]   My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL = DONE "If you’re going to kill = each other, do it outside.  I just finished = cleaning!"   My = mother taught me RELIGION "You better pray that will…

IF FAMOUS = HISTORICAL FIGURES WERE LOOKING FOR A JOB = TODAY…   JULIUS CAESAR: = My last job involved a lot of office politics and back stabbing. I’d = like to get away from all that.   JESSE JAMES: I = can list among my experience and skills: leadership,…