Grif.Net

[As a veteran = pastor/college professor of 50+ years I am often asked by young men how = to know when a ministry is "over" and you should seek a move = to another church or retired totally. Here are some warning = signs.]   "You know = it’s over…

Q: What = happens when winter arrives? A: Autumn = leaves   Q: What do = snowmen say when they take pictures? A: = Freeze   Q: Why did the = farmer only wear one boot to town? A: Weatherman = said there would be a 50% chance of snow…

Did you hear = about the Dalmatian who lost playing hide-and-seek every = time? He was always = spotted.   Did you hear = about the kidnapping at the elementary school? Everything is = okay now. He woke up.   Did you hear = about the ghost who was caught…

Scott M asked, = “This whole birthday thing is getting old, don’t you = think?”   Kim E = confessed, “I had the rudest, slowest, nastiest cashier today. = Guess it’s my own fault for using the self-checkout = lane.”   Ken M reminds = us, “If your grandma got…

[Final decade = to test your knowledge of more recent history]   1. 2010 = – An explosion and fire on the _____________________ oil rig in = the Gulf of Mexico sends millions of gallons of oil into the sea. =   2. 2011 = – For the first time…

[Here is a = collection of quotations from famous authors to warm your hearts this = January]   &qu= ot;Advice is like the snow. The softer it falls, the longer it dwells = upon and the deeper it sinks into the mind.” – Samuel = Taylor Coleridge   &qu= ot;No…

[Hanukkah, = Advent, Christmas, New Year, Epiphany have all passed into history for = another year. Here is my unvarnished opinion of the holiday time, some = original and some borrowed from people far funnier or more insightful = than I will ever be.] I got my wish for Christmas…

Q: What do you = call an old snowman? A: = Water.   Q: Why = don’t mountains get cold in the winter? A: They wear = snow caps.   Q: What two = letters of the alphabet do snowmen prefer? A: = I.C.   Q: How do = Eskimos…

Did you hear = about the nurse who always carried a red pen? She wanted to = be able to draw blood if needed.   Did you hear = that 2019 and 2020 got into a fight? 2021=   Did you hear = about the steam engine that added bubble-gum…

A wife texted her husband at his office on a cold January = morning: "Windows frozen, won’t open." Husband texted her back: = "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it." Wife texted back 5 minutes later: = "Computer is really messed up = now.”     ~~ANSWERS FOR = 2000-2009…

[A new year = often means looking back. In this case, only a couple of decades = back]   1. 2000 = – Health fears over ____________________ spread over Britain and = Europe from tainted food.   2. 2001 = – The ____________ government in Afghanistan fail to hand over…

If 2020 was a = year of pain, I pray that 2021 will be a year of = healing.   If 2020 was a = year of joy, I pray that 2021 will be a year when that joy is = doubled.   If 2020 was a = year of…

[On the = 1st of each month we try to share interesting = word-plays.  Again, this month, we fail.]   *Humans are = scared of hippos because they think they are violent and responsible for = hundreds of deaths per year.  In reality, people kill way more = people per…