Grif.Net

On = the first day God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the = door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will = give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That’s = too long to…

Bret P = admited, “I love God, but some of His children really get on my = nerves.”   Myrna T = confessed, “At the end of my last appointment, my doctor took his = own blood pressure.”   Joseph C = expressed, “A truckload of Vicks Vapor Rub overturned…

The dinner = guests were sitting around the table discussing life. One man, a CEO, = decided to explain the problem with education. He argued, "What’s a = kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was = to become a teacher?"  He reminded the…

[Someone asked = that since now I=E2=80=99m starting my 75th year, could I = share some insights about my personal life. Sure = thing.]   I went to a = psychic and knocked on her front door. She yelled "Who is = it?" I = left. =E2=80=8B=E2=80= =8B I have…

[For new = subscribers to the Grif.Net or for those reading the daily blog on www.grif.net or on Facebook – on = Monday-Friday we send out a slightly warped blend of humor. On the = weekend we send out material that is more serious of a moral, ethical, = religious,…

If you grew up = in a generation before there was fast food, you may want to share some = of these memories with your children or grandchildren. Just don’t blame = me if they bust a gut laughing. Here are some memories of growing up in = the post-war…

[On Monday, I = celebrated my first birthday in retirement. Thank you to all who are = working hard to support me, since FDR and Congress lied and never did = put any of MY money into an "untouchable" fund so it would be = here at retirement with interest,…

How do I know = today is my 74th birthday?  Even without a calendar, I = know, because . . .   …Everything = that works hurts, and what doesn’t hurt doesn’t = work.   …I feel like = the morning after, and I haven’t been anywhere.   …My little…

A Psalm of = Life (by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow) Tell me not, = in mournful numbers, Life is but an = empty dream! For the soul = is dead that slumbers, And things are = not what they seem.   Life is real! = Life is earnest! And the grave…

We’ve = enjoyed updates on mergers thus far in 2022.  Market consultants = are now predicting some potential mergers for the remainder of the = year:   Hale Business = Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. may merge = before the end of Lent and…

JER= USALEM, (Religious News Service) — Continuing the current trend back = towards turn-of-the-century monopolies, it was announced today at a = press conference that Christmas and Chanukah will merge.   An = industry source said that the deal had been in the works for about 1300 = years, ever…

WASHINGTON, (UPSI) — In a deal that resonated in homes = across the country, Cats announced today that it had completed an = extremely hostile takeover of Dogs.   The new company, which Cats said will be called OnePet, = will supplant the recently created Fishbirdgroup as the world’s largest…

CON= CORD, N.H., Mar 4 (Rooters) — Continuing the wave of consolidation that = saw Alabama, Mississippi and Georgia join to form Nationsouth, Vermont = and New Hampshire signed a deal today that will combine the two into one = state. They have adopted the motto "Live Free or Whatever."…