Daily Humor

= According to the chocolate a= dvent calendar I bought yesterday … There are only thre= e days until Christmas.   I really don&#8= 217;t see much future for advent calendars. It feels like t= heir days are numbered.   Just came home = to find all my doors and…

= During the hustle and bustle= of Christmas shopping, a lady forgot her handbag in her cart as she piled = her purchases in the car. A few minutes later it was found by an honest lit= tle boy who returned it to the lost and found. They called her…

= Managing my weight around th= e holidays just requires a little planning. For example, I = took the batteries out of my scale on December 1st.   I placed Christmas decorations around my pottery cla= ss display. The teacher said it wasn’t great, but at le= ast it had…

= [Many familiar quotations or phrases come from the Bard of Avon. Your task = is to give the 15 plays from which these 15 quotations originated. Or wait = until tomorrow, read the correct answers, and say, “I knew ‘em = all”. I used a quotation as an example.…

= [Whetting the appetite for &= #8220;Crazy Christmas Content” coming up this month.] Q: What&= #8217;s the difference between Saint George and Santa’s reindeer? A: One slays a dragon; the others are dragging a sleigh.   Q: Why does Santa enter houses through chimneys= ? A: Because chimneys soot him.…

= [Collection of favorites quo= tations that lift the spirit and soul at Thanksgiving]   Albert Einstein “There are only tw= o ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other = is as though everything is a miracle.”   Steve Maraboli “If you…

= [Collection of favorites quo= tations that lifts our spirit and soul at Thanksgiving]   Neal A. Maxwell“We should certainly count ou= r blessings, but we should also make our blessings count.”=   John Quincy Adams “Grat= itude, warm, sincere, intense, when it takes possession of the bosom, fills= the…

= [Collection of favorites quo= tations that lift spirit and soul at Thanksgiving]   Will Arnett “I am = happy because I’m grateful. I choose to be grateful. That gratitude a= llows me to be happy.”   John F. = Kennedy “As we express our gratitude, we must never= forget…

= Q: What’s the best way= to stuff a turkey? A: Serve it pizza and ice cream.   Q: What do you call a turkey the day after Tha= nksgiving? A: Lucky!   Q: W= hat do you call the turkey prom? A: It was a Butterball.   Q: What…

= Q: How many cooks do you nee= d to stuff a turkey? A: Just one, but sometimes they don&#82= 17;t fit.   Q: What do you get when you dr= op a pumpkin? A: Squash.   = Q: How many bakers does it take to make a pie?  =…

= "Thanksgiving is a time to count your blessings, one by one, as each r= elative finally goes home." &#8212= ; Melanie White   "Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot c= ake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie." — Jim Davis   “I come from a family…

= [Kenneth Peterson wrote a sh= ort devotional on our “Legacy of Love”. Teresa and I read it, a= nd she said we have many friends our age in this same stage of life and sho= uld share it.=A0 Best way for us to share is through our more serious…

A little= boy was ushered into the clinic’s waiting room, with a bloody gash o= n his head.   "What happened?" asked the receptionist behind the de= sk.   Crying, the boy replied, "My sister hit me with a couple of tomat= oes."   The nurse was called to sort…