Daily Humor

1. About Taxis.  Which city in the US has the = most taxicabs?  About how many people use them on an average = day.   2. About Marriage.  Which states have the lowest = marriage rate in the US?  Which states have the = highest?   3. About Housing. About…

[And before you ask, yes, I’m still hanging with = grandkids]   A friend was out fishing in the lake. He reached for a = pack of cigarettes but found he had forgotten the matches.  How did = he solve this dilemma?He opened the pack, dropped one cigarette = overboard…

Here’s an example of how the Lord’s = Prayer can guide your prayers (by Max Lucado) Our = FatherThank you for adopting me into your = family.Who isThank you, my Lord,for being a God of the = present tense:my Jehovah-jireh (the God who provides),my = Jehovah-raah (the caring Shepherd),my Jehovah-shalom…

[Hanging with 9 of 13 grandkids, so have to ask = questions from age 6 to 17] What do you call the Nintendo Wii in = France?A Nintendo Yes ~~What do you do with a sick chemist?If = you can’t Curium or Helium, you have to Barium. (I’d tell you…

Q: What’s back, wheat, and read all over?A: = Autocorrect   ~~ Autocorrect makes me say things I didn’t = Nintendo.   ~~And now it appears autocorrect has become = my worst enema.   ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] www.grif.net = "Jesus Knows Me, This I = Love!"  

Due to the widespread appreciation of = yesterday’s insights on coffee, here are more meditations on the = magical beans . . . “How do I take my coffee? Seriously. = Very seriously.”   “I = drink coffee for your protection.”   “Procaffinating: the tendency not to start = anything…

Meditation on my coffee cup this morning . . . = “Every day take time = to smell the coffee”   “Hello = darkness my old friend” “Espresso = yourself” “Better latte than = never”   “My blood type is dark roast Arabica = positive”   “Take = life one…

At the Wyoming State Police Academy a recruit = was asked, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own = mother?” His answer? “I’d call for = backup.”   ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] www.grif.net = "Jesus Knows Me, This I = Love!"  

[Didn’t know at the time how high the bar was = set by President Ronald Reagan. Here are some bits of wisdom from the = last great POTUS]   "Socialism only works in two places:  = Heaven where they don’t need it and hell where they already have = it."   “Here’s…

Q: It’s Friday the = 13th. Do you have any superstitions?A: No. I think it’s unlucky to = have superstitions, and something bad might = happen.   ~~Q: Why aren’t = people in America afraid of Friday the 13th?A: After losing their = home, job, and 401k, and the prospect…

An elderly pastor = was dying and wanted a clean conscience. He shared with his wife some of = his secret thoughts, then asked her if she had any secrets from more = than five decades of marriage She took out a box from the close = that she had…

I hate being bi-polar. It’s = awesome.   No, you may not "axe" me a = question. I don’t speak welfare.   I hope the friends that haven’t called me in = a while know how much I appreciate that.   I’ve never seen a tombstone that read: = "Died…

Did you hear about the guy whose wife threw a bottle = of omega-3 pills at this head?He’s been hospitalized with = super fish oil injuries. Did you hear about my perfect grandson = who has never failed a class, doesn’t drink/smoke or come home = late?He will be six…