[Each month we start with bad puns, bad wordplays, bad jokes, a= nd bad luck.  Here is #1 for the New Year. You will want to wash your = eyes after reading.]   NASA is sending a new mission to say ‘sorry’ to= any UFO’s or aliens out in space…

C.S. Lewis “There are bett= er things ahead than any we leave behind.”   Albert Einstein “Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorr= ow.”   Prophet Jeremiah “Because of the = Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail= =2E They are new every…

A man was driving down a Gulf Coast road when a policeman stopp= ed him. The officer looked in the back of the man’s truck and said, &= #8220;Why are these penguins in your truck?” The man replied, “These are my penguins. Got ‘em for= a Christmas present.” “= This…

Since I was a little tot, I recall the cheerful banter as we pa= rted from family and friend. The rhyming “See You Later, Alligator!&#= 8221; was always answered by “After While, Crocodile!” = It wasn’t long before we made up our own rhymes (some good, some bad,= some ugly)…

DATELINE: She= boygan   Otto, the historic statue of a local otter, was s= tolen from the city park. Within two days, Otto was rescued, and the perpet= rator apprehended. Authorities are trying to determine if the thief = should be charged with kidnapping or grand theft Otto.   ~~…

A guy said to God, "God, is it true that to you a billion = years is like a second?"God said, “Yes.”. Then the guy said, "God, is it true that to you= a billion dollars is like a penny?"God said, “Yes.” Finally, the guy asked, "So, God, ca= n…

THE CHRISTMAS STORY (from the GOSPEL OF LUKE) "And it came to pass in those days, that t= here went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be t= axed. (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)= And all went to…

‘Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of = kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, becom= e a child again at Christmas time.’ ~Laur= a Ingalls Wilder   ‘I will honor Christmas in my heart and try to keep it a= ll…

Just before Christmas 2023, God was looking down at Earth an= d saw all the evil happening.  He decided to send an angel down to Ear= th to check it out. When the angel returned, the verdict was, "Yes, it= is bad on Earth – 95% is bad and 5%…

[Some easy. Some hard.  Test your knowledge of Christma= s traditions]   1. What is usually concealed in the Christmas pudding?   2. A t= raditional advent calendar has how many days?   3. What is the last day of Ch= ristmas called?   4. Traditional Christingle can be made…

A couple years ago, the wife and I were headed to California= and out of the snow and cold.  Now, I’m into Christmas, but can’t sta= nd airports with tacky red and green decor, and loudspeakers blaring elevat= or renditions of so-called Christmas music.   I grit my teeth and…

The weather is unseasonable warm for December, with no snow or = ice here in southeastern Wisconsin, so the wife and I took a long, leisurel= y drive around the city to enjoy a burger, an opportunity for time together= , and to look at the Christmas decorations in each…

After a prolonged drought, when the rain came all the animals i= n Australia were happy.  Except the Kangaroo.   When the others asked her wha= t the reason was for such sadness, the Kangaroo revealed this fact.  &= #8220;When it rains, all the kids now have to play inside.”…