Grif.Net

07/26/10 Grif.Net – Definitions

07/26/10 Grif.Net – Definitions

ABDICATE: to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

ADULT: One who has stopped growing at both ends and now grows middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS: The only creatures you eat before they are born and after they are
dead.

COFFEE: a person who is coughed upon.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

FLABBERGASTED: appalled over how much weight you have gained.

FLATULENCE: the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over
by a steamroller.

FRISBEETARIANISM: The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up on the
roof and gets stuck there.

GARGOYLE: an olive-flavored mouthwash.

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

LYMPH: to walk with a lisp.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

OYSTER: a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines!

~~
Dr Bob Griffin
[email protected] www.grif.net
“Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”