MORE real headlines that make you scratch your head . = . . **NEW STUDY OF OBESITY LOOKS FOR LARGER TEST GROUP = **CHEF THROWS HIS HEART INTO HELPING FEED = NEEDY **XRAYS OF TEACHER’S HEAD REVEALS = NOTHING **KIDS MAKE NUTRTIOUS SNACKS **LAWMAKERS =…
12/04/19 Grif.Net – Did You Hear?
Did you hear = about the quarterback who faked the throw and ran the ball? = It was a faux = pass. Did you hear = about the old lady who lived in a shoe? When she = became an empty-nester, she moved to a flat. Did you…
12/03/19 Grif.Net – Made-Up Words
[“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said = in a rather scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean = – nothing more nor less.” So let us find a = “meaning” and then MAKE UP new words to match = it.] ATHLETHARGY =3D the…
12/02/19 Grif.Net – First of the Month Misery
[Despite = pleas, the first weekday of the month is replete with so-called = humor] If your = birthday is today, you obviously weren’t born yesterday. = Don’t interrupt me when I’m working intently on a puzzle or = you may hear some crosswords. An outrageous =…
11/30/19 Weekend Grif.Net – Motto
Happiness = keeps you sweet. Trials keep = you strong. Sorrow keeps = you human. Failure keeps = you humble. Courage keeps = you going. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = bob@grif.net = www.grif.net "Jesus = Knows Me, This I Love!"
11/29/19 Grif.Net – Reflections on Thanksgiving
‘If my = grandmother saw me making mashed potatoes from a box, she would turn = over in her gravy.” “My = family asked me not to tell any lame ‘Dad Jokes’ at the = table, but I couldn’t quit cold = turkey.” “Not = saying I ate…
11/28/19 Thanksgiving Grif.Net – 1789 Presidential Proclamation
Whereas it is = the duty of all Nations = to acknowledge the providence of almighty God, to obey his will, to be = grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and = favor – and Whereas both Houses of Congress have by their joint = Committee…
11/27/19 Grif.Net – Words with Friends
Marilyn said, “When I was a little girl my brother = would always say ‘Excuse my French’ after a cuss word. My first = day of school the teacher asked if anyone knew French. I raised my hand.” Bryan asked, “Should I tell a sodium joke? = Na.”(I agree,…
11/26/19 Grif.Net – Communication
[Not saying I = am old but did have this conversation with a 20-something last = week] Him: = “Do you still like Eminem?” Me: “I = prefer Skittles.” Him: = “No, I meant the rapper.” Me: “Why = would you eat the wrapper?” Him:…
11/25/19 Grif.Net – Marriage Counseling for Wayne & Mary
[Reading his story, I’m thinking my friend/former = co-worker Wayne and his bride may need some MORE counseling. He says . . = . ] My wife keeps telling me that I’m the cheapest person = she’s ever known in all her life.I’m not buying it. My wife…
11/23/19 Weekend Grif.Net – Prayer of an Aging Woman
Lord, you know = better than I myself know, that I am growing older and will someday be = old. Keep me from being talkative and particularly from the fatal = habit of thinking that I must say something about every subject and on = every occasion. Release me…
11/22/19 Grif.Net – Books Never Written (part 5)
[Final batch = of silly jokes from olden days of youth] Where’s = Grandma’s Purse by Robin Nana Guide to = Preserving Fruit and Vegetables by Mason Jar Stopping By = the Woods on a Fall Morning by Seymour = Treese Lullaby by = Sarah Nade …
11/21/19 Grif.Net – Books Never Written (part 4)
[Another day, = another trip down memory lane of juvenile = joking] How to Write a = Mystery Novel by Paige Turner The Great = English Breakfast by Chris P. Bacon Tight = Situation by Leah Tard Meeting in = France by Ron DeVous A Trip…