Grif.Net

My wife and I = had this long argument about the appropriate shoes to wear when = gardening. She = wouldn’t listen and kept digging in her = heels.   At the bakery, = I saw a long stick of bread posed for a photo, not for = sale. Evidently,…

A teacher = shared with me: September 1st and school was starting in a = few days. I was starting my 17th year teaching 3rd = graders, that special year in school I loved as children mastered = cursive writing, multiplication tables, maps, and music.  In the = next room…

The wife sent me to Kohl’s to return a pair of = slacks that did not fit. I was at the friendly customer-service desk, = making small talk with the clerk. They have a super return policy but = wanted to know if the size was miss-marked, had a defect…

Well, we just = completed the 26th year of sharing the grif net humor with you all, and = I finally came up with the best clock joke ever. I know what = you’re all thinking. It’s about = time.   ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] = www.grif.net =…

The sky was = looking ominous, so I asked Siri, “Surely, it’s not going to = rain again today?” She replied, “Yes, it is and = don’t call me Shirley!” I guess I left my phone in = Airplane mode again.   [from = boredpanda and many other places]  …

The = 10th grade biology class was out on a ranch for a field trip. = One boy asked the teacher, "Sir, we were chasing a snake and wonder = if it is poisonous?"   The teacher = said, "What have we learned in class about snakes? NO snake in…

[Despite = popular opinion we are offering another serving of riddles for the = kiddles]   Q: What did = Mom and Dad Hamburger name their daughter? A: = Patty.   Q: What = building in your town is the tallest? A: The library = has the most stories.  …

Steve McQueen = was a Hollywood bad boy and headstrong thrill-seeker, drawn to drugs, = women, fast cars, and motorcycles. At the height of his stardom in the = 1960s and ’70s, Steve McQueen was at the top of his game, yet the = “King of Cool” was still searching…

Years ago in our small town, I took my little boy for a = ride on the back of my bicycle. We stopped at the post office to pick up = my mail. I quickly scanned the pile and headed out.  He asked if we = had gotten any letters.…

A dog saw a "Now hiring" poster outside of a = computer store.  The poster read: "Must be able to type. Must = be able to program. And must be bilingual. We are an equal opportunity = employer." The dog took the poster in his = mouth and walked in.…

[Found many = families enjoy lame grif net jokes for their children. I think they must = love to hear kids groaning and rolling their eyes at someone else!  = So here is another batch for the dinner table!]   Q: Why is = basketball the messiest sport? A: The…

Q: Why = didn’t people believe Jonah and his story of being swallowed in = the sea?A: They thought it sounded a little fishy. Q: Why = didn’t anyone want to fight Goliath?  A: It seemed = like a giant ordeal. Q: What = was Moses’ wife, Zipporah, known as when she’d throw…

[Remember the = old days at work when you overheard odd snippets of conversation at = coffee break or in the corridors? Imagine your reaction to = these.] A woman had a baby, then simply set fire to all the bills = the hospital and doctor sent. As she skipped…