Grif.Net

[94-year-old Clint Eastwood shared these tru= ths]   “Do not look for luxury in watch= es or bracelets; do not look for luxury in forks or sails.   Luxury is laughter and friends, luxury is rain on your face= , luxury is hugs and kisses.   Don’t look for= luxury…

Dear Dad,   $chool i$ really great.  I am making lot$ of = friend$ this new $eme$ter, and $till $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply can’t think of anythin= g I need. $o, if you’d like, ju$t $end me a card or a $hort text, a$ =…

An elderly woman decided to prepare her will= and told her lawyer she had two final requests.   First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes s= cattered over Wal-Mart.    ‘Wal-Ma= rt?’ the lawyer exclaimed. ‘Why Wal-Mart?’     ‘Well, then I’ll be sure my…

A woman phoned her husband at work.   HIM: "I’m sorry, = dear, but I’m up to my neck in work right now and I can’t talk."   HER: = "But I’ve got some good news and some bad news for you, honey."   H= IM: "OK, darling, but since…

Everyone should know the State Capitals sinc= e 5th grade Social Studies class (there were only 48 in my day).= But this is more about the STATES and capitals, not just a rote list or ma= tching. Each answer MUST BE the STATE name with clues about their ca= pitals.…

[Many questions come across my desk each day. Here are some fro= m last week, along with insightful answers.] Q: Do you know where to buy chicken broth in bulk? A: The Stock Market. &n= bsp; Q: Where do bad rainbows go? A: To prism. But it’s a light sentence.…

[From an  episode of The Andy Griffith = Show]  = When Barney told Andy he should jus= t let Opie "decide for himself" how he wanted to live, Andy had t= hese words of wisdom.   "No, I’m afraid= it don’t work that way. You can’t let a young’n decide…

Ken M. prays, “My goal this week is to= move just enough so people don’t think I’m dead.”Glenda G. related, “In order to drive an electric car in Wisconsin I= have to have a current license.”   Way= ne I. taught, “I used to hear music in my western hat,…

Just before the funeral service, the underta= ker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, ‘How old was your hu= sband?’    ’98,’ she= replied. ‘He was only a year older than me’.=   ‘So you’re 97,’ the undertaker commented.   She responded suspiciously, ‘I know w= hat…

A friend traveled to Ireland for the first t= ime. His flight to Dublin arrived in the morning, and he traveled into the = countryside to stay for a few days. He visited the Blarney Stone, fed some = animals at a farm, walked lush green meadows, and even got…

[Been a whle since we had a weekly funquiz o= n some basic facts of our world’s five major continents. All figures = from UN Estimates, Aug 1, 2024 since big change this year! Apologies to tho= se friends down under, but if you hadn‘t felt like a red-headed step-=…

I‘ve experienced:   1. My memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Also, = my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be.   2. I found out how to prevent sagging. I just eat till the wrinkles f= ill out.   3. Doc says I may win…

A poem was written by Charles Wesley in 1739= to commemorate the anniversary of his conversion to Christ on May 21, 1738= =2E Remember, like so many who call themselves “christian” toda= y, Wesley worked, studied, gave, prayed, even being ordained, and served as= a foreign missionary but had never…