I didn’t know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I continued. At last she headed…
02/24/07 Weekend Grif.Net – Triple Filter Test
In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, “Do you know what I just heard about your friend?” “Hold on a minute,” Socrates replied. “Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be good…
02/23/07 Grif.Net – Surgery
THINGS YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR DURING SURGERY 1. Better save that. We’ll need it for the autopsy. 2. Someone call the janitor. We’re going to need a mop. 3. Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness. 4. Rusty! Rusty! Come back with that! Bad dog! 5. Wait a…
02/22/07 Grif.Net – Pets are Better than Kids
[Yesterday we shared “rules” for dogs and for company. Here are some reminders of why many think pets are to be preferred over kids] Dogs and cats are better than kids because they: 1. Eat less 2. Don’t ask for money all the time 3. Are easier to train 4.…
02/21/07 Grif.Net – Pet Rules
PET RULES (To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door – nose height) Dear Dogs and Cats, The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my…
02/20/07 Grif.Net – Grandma is in Trouble
Little Jacob saw his Grandma coming down the walk with his Mom. “I sure am happy to see you, now maybe Daddy will do the trick he’s been promising.” Grandma was curious and asked, “What trick is that?” Jacob answered, “I heard him tell Mommy that he would climb the…
02/19/07 Grif.Net – Chicken Farmer
A life-long city man, tired of the rat race, decided he was going to give up the city life, move to the country, and become a chicken farmer. He bought a chicken farm. As it turned out, his next door neighbor was also a chicken farmer. The neighbor came for…
02/18/07 Grif.Net – Encouragement
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side. Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain. Leave to thy God to order and provide; In every change, He faithful will remain. Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.…
02/17/07 Weekend Grif.Net – The Carpenter
Once upon a time, two brothers who lived on adjoining farms fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side-by-side, sharing machinery and trading labor and goods as needed without a hitch. Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding…
02/16/07 Grif.Net – Another Sad Valentine
Another poor soul, Len, forgot Valentine’s Day and he was seen talking yesterday with his friend Earl. Earl asked, “How bad is it? Do you think you’ll be able to salvage your marriage?” Len replied, “This may be the straw that broke the camel’s back. She hasn’t spoken to me…
02/15/07 Grif.Net – Forgot Valentine’s Day
Husband: “I am SO sorry that I forgot Valentine’s Day. I know you must be hurt and angry with such a fool like me. What can I do for you to forgive me?” Wife: “I have already dealt with it” Husband: “What did you do?” Wife: “I cleaned the toilet…
02/14/07 Grif.Net – Today
The beauty of my wife . . . is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of my wife . . . is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the…
02/13/07 Grif.Net – Valentines for Kids
[I have ten – count ’em – grandchildren, with the oldest at 7. Lexie turned 2 a few hours ago. So here is some Valentine Day humor for the KIDS!] Q. What did the valentine card say to the stamp? A. Stick with me and we’ll go places! Q. Do…