[One more day of silly humor, then some serious stuff:] At our Passover Seder, we had whole wheat and bran matzo, fortified with Metamucil. The brand name, of course, is “Let My People Go”. Q: On what do Jews recline on Passover in New York? A: A sofer Passover Poem…
04/04/07 Grif.Net – Passover Week #3
Rabbi Mordechai Bulua reminds us: How did Passover get its name? Since the Seder table is usually made larger, people can’t reach for the items on the table and invariably ask others: “Could you please Pass Over the matzos . . .” How is a good sermon like a piece…
04/03/07 Grif.Net – Passover Week #2
[How ’bout some humor for this special week?] It seems a group of leading medical people have published data that indicates that Seder participants should NOT partake of both chopped liver and charoses at the same time. It is indicated that this combination can lead to Charoses of the Liver.…
04/02/07 Grif.Net – Passover Week #1
[Sorry if you don’t celebrate Passover. I grew up “multi” religious, with some relatives being cultural Jews, others Catholic or Baptist. So learned traditions and humor of this special week. Each day we’ll share an aspect of the holiday that should bring a smile, even to the goyim out there.]…
03/31/07 Weekend Grif.Net – Gun Control
[From: Ed Chenel, a police officer in Australia; no claim on how accurate his opinions or statistics are. But food for thought.] I thought you all would like to see the real figures from Down Under. It has now been 12 months since gun owners in Australia were forced by…
03/30/07 Grif.Net – GHEAUGHTEIGHPTOUGH
Melville Dewey (of Dewey Decimal library classification system fame) spelled a common word GHEAUGHTEIGHPTOUGH following legitimate rules of English. “GH” pronounced as in hiccough “EAU” pronounced as in beau “GHT” pronounced as in naught “EIGH” pronounced as in neighbor “PT” pronounced as in pterodactyl and “OUGH” pronounced as in though.…
03/29/07 Grif.Net – Advice for April’s Taxes
[My tax advisor is not making a lot of cents, but I’ll share the wealth of ideas he shared with me.] There incomes a time in every person’s life when they become mired in a hole world of debt, and at the expense of being cliche, ‘The only sure thing…
03/28/07 Grif.Net – Prayer for Those Planning Cruises
[After her recent cruise, Sharon Jackson wrote this prayer; throw stones at her] Heavenly Father, look down on us your humble, obedient cruising servants, who are doomed to cruise this earth, taking photographs, mailing postcards, buying souvenirs, eating ourselves silly and walking around muggy Caribbean islands in drip-dry underwear. We…
03/27/07 Grif.Net – Cruise Musings
Don Sherman was a resident comedian on board the “Summit”, our ship of choice for a cruise to Hawaii and back. Not only did he keep all in stitches with a hilarious evening show in the Celebrity Theater, he met with a small group in the Rendezvous Lounge on another…
03/26/07 Grif.Net – Top Ten List
TOP 10 THINGS MEN KNOW ABOUT WOMEN: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given
03/24/07 Weekend Grif.Net – Newspaper Editors
“It appears we have appointed our worst generals to command forces, and our most gifted and brilliant to edit newspapers! In fact, I discovered by reading newspapers that these editor/geniuses plainly saw all my strategic defects from the start, yet failed to inform me until it was too late. Accordingly,…
03/23/07 Grif.Net – MORE Verbal Profundities
[Way too much fun with Verbal Profundities. Here are fifteen more!] Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. A backward poet writes inverse. In a democracy, your vote counts; in feudalism, your Count votes. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress. Show me…
03/22/07 Grif.Net – Verbal Profundities
[English is a fun language. Here are 15 kind of “profound” statements for your enjoyment] Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit…