Grif.Net

[Bumper = Stickers worth a chuckle. Feel free to comment on your choice of the = best of today’s collection]   Rock is dead. = Long live paper and scissors.   Veni, Vidi, = Velcro. I came, I saw, I stuck around.   Watch out for = the idiot behind…

[Bumper = Stickers worth a chuckle. Feel free to comment on your choice of best = one today]   EARTH FIRST! = We’ll strip-mine the other planets later.   My wife keeps = complaining I never listen to her (or something like that). =   Veni, Vedi, = Visa: I…

[Bumper = Stickers worth a chuckle. Feel free to comment on your choice of best = today]   Without = geometry, life is pointless.   Stable = relationships are for horses.   Your body = would look good in my trunk.   Just say NO to = negativity.   When…

[Bumper = Stickers worth a chuckle. Feel free to comment on your choice of best = each day]   I plan to live = forever. So far, so good!   Gravity – It’s = not just a good idea, it’s the LAW.   People like = you are the reason…

“What = the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls a = butterfly.” – = Richard Bach   “A ship = in harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for.” = – John = Shedd   “You&#821= 7;re braver than you believe, stronger than…

When I was in = my younger days, I weighed a few pounds less. I needn’t hold = my tummy in to wear a belted dress. But now that I = am older, I’ve set my body free;There’s the comfort of = elastic where once my waist would be.  …

DID YOU KNOW . = . . strong emotions are stupid and should be = hated?   DID YOU KNOW . = . . stealing ideas from one person is plagiarism, but stealing from many = is research?   DID YOU KNOW . = . . I used to be…

[Match each of = these 25 states with an Iconic Brand associated with it. Yes, I’m = actually GIVING you all the right answers as a sweet way to start the = new year!]   1 = ALBERTSON’S 2 = APPLE 3 BANK OF = AMERICA 4 BEN & =…

I WILL READ = MORE IN 2023. (Start by turning on closed captioning on the = television)   I WILL DRINK = NO MORE COFFEE. (But no less, either)   I WILL NOT = DRINK ORANGE JUICE. (After brushing my teeth in the = morning)   I WILL LIMIT =…

[First of the = month puns, continuing the 2022 series of Tom Swifty jokes. This month = are “N” adverbs.]   "Why are = you lying down so close to me in the Garden of Eden?" asked Adam = naively.   "You’re a = real zero," said Tom naughtily.  …

“It is = not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.” = – Sir = Edmund Hillary   “The = moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease forever to be able to do = it.” – J.M. = Barrie   “If you = hear a voice within you say,…

The pastor was = handed a note to read that said, “Mark Anderson having gone to = sea, his wife desires the congregation to pray for his = safety.” The pastor scanned it, then announced, “Mark = Anderson, having gone to see his wife, desires the congregation to pray =…

A pastor found = a note on the pulpit.  It contained only one word – = “Stupid”. He read it aloud to the congregation, then = added, “I have often received notes that were unsigned beneath = nasty messages.  But this is the first one I’ve received with = no…