Grif.Net

When I think = of an “icebreaker”, my first reaction is “fat = penguin”.   I can’t = take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him. I = guess that’s what I get for buying a pure bread = dog.   I opened the…

What kind of = award does Wisconsin’s top dentist get? Just a little = plaque.   What is the = number one reason patients don’t show up for root = canals? They lose = their nerve.   What do kids = call a dentist’s office? The filling = station.  …

What is the = best way to criticize your boss?  Very quietly, = so he cannot hear you.    Our computers = went down at the office today, so we had to do everything manually. = It took me = fifteen minutes to shuffle the cards for = Solitaire.    …

*I recently = started speed reading. So far, I can read “War and Peace” in = ten seconds. It’s = only three words, but it’s a start.   *I bought the = world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it = terrible, but it’s also terrible.   *I just wrote…

A foot of snow = on a school day was a dream come true.   Abilities were = discovered because of a “double-dog-dare.” =   Saturday = morning cartoons weren’t 30-minute ads for action = figures.   No shopping = trip was complete unless a new toy was brought =…

“A bird = doesn’t sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a = song.” – Maya = Angelou   “The sun = himself is weak when he first rises and gathers strength and courage as = the day gets on.” – = Charles Dickens   “A…

Little is = known about the hunchback of Notre Dame who lived in the bell tower and = would run around putting his head against the vibrating bell and push it = to enhance the sound.  One day he slipped and fell hundreds = of feet to his death. Peasants…

DID YOU KNOW . = . . changing your iPod’s name to Titanic will not make it sync = faster?   DID YOU KNOW . = . . a Texas gambler visiting Vegas put a cow in an elevator so he could = raise the steaks?   DID YOU KNOW…

Ken M shared, = “I’m back with doable New Year’s Resolutions: Procrastinate more. = Okay, I’ll start tomorrow.”   Bob T said, = “I live to help my friends. If they lose weight, I find = it.”   Andrea S = boasted, “At midnight on New Year’s Eve I stood…

A horse walked = into a caf=E9 and ordered a big mixed greens salad.=A0 The waitress = said, “You know, you’re in here often. Wonder if the rancher = knows you have a problem with your diet? Don’t you think you might = be becoming addicted to human food?”  …

One day a = 12-year-old boy was walking down the street when a car pulled up beside = him and the driver lowered a window.   "I’ll = give you a large bag of M&Ms if you get in the car," said the = driver.   "No way! = Get…

“Courage = isn’t having the strength to go on. It is going on when you don’t = have strength.” – = Napoleon Bonaparte   “The = greatest accomplishment is not in never falling, but in rising again = after you fall.” — Vince = Lombardi   “Worry = does not…

[Bumper = Stickers worth a chuckle. Feel free to comment on your opinion of best = today]   Does the name = Pavlov ring a bell?   My dog can = lick anyone.   Suburbia: = Where they tear out the trees and name streets after them. =   I’m…