Grif.Net

A kindergarten teacher gave her class a “show and tell” assignment. Each student was instructed to bring in an object to share with the class that represented their religious faith. The first student got up in front of the class and said, “My name is Benjamin and I am Jewish.…

We had the Tom Swifties’ “a” adverbs. Here are some from each other letter .. . “Use your own toothbrush!” Tom bristled. “I’d like to be a Chinese laborer,” said Tom coolly. “For you I’d even be a disenfranchised Michigan delegate,” said Tom devotedly. “The radio reception is much better…

Tom Swifties are adverbial puns. They were originated by Edward Stratemeyer in a series of strip cartoons about a character called Tom Swift. “That was in the USA in the 1920s” Ed states decadently. Here are some of my favorites with the letter “a” – (it will be a while…

A former student who has been pastoring for many years (THAT makes me feel old) called and asked about “moving on” and changing ministries. When IS the right time? How do you know? So here is some advice: “You know it’s time to leave your church when . . .…

Harvey forwarded this and it stumped me: See if you can figure out what these words have in common. 1 Banana 2 Dresser 3 Grammar 4 Potato 5 Revive 6 Uneven 7 Assess Are you peeking or have you already given up? Give it another try. Look at each word…

[My apologies to some out there who accidentally received the “Weekend” Grif.Net in your in-box on Wednesday!! It wasn’t even read to “send”, but out it went. I blame a glitch in the computer program I use. My computer said “I” did it – who you gonna believe?? My computer…

Church Attendance: Is It Important? by Earl Blackburn Being faithful and consistent in attending a true church of Jesus Christ and worshipping God is extremely important, more important than you may realize. Irregularity and unfaithfulness in attending church conveys a certain message and produces definite short-term and far reaching effect.…

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. -Anonymous Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. -Ann Landers If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they…

Sue forwarded this story – I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were shouting, “13…13….13…13.” The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the planks and looked through to see what was going on. Someone behind…

Temperatures (high/low) on the Memorial Day Weekend 2008 . . in Iraq Friday =3D 109=B0 F | 82=B0 F Saturday =3D 111=B0 F | 82=B0 F=20 Sunday =3D 109=B0 F | 82=B0 F=20 Monday =3D 104=B0 F | 78=B0 F=20 Tuesday =3D 100=B0 F | 78=B0 F=20 Let us pray.…

NBA, NHL OR NFL? 36 have been accused of spousal abuse 7 have been arrested for fraud 19 have been accused of writing bad checks 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least two businesses 3 have done time for assault 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad…

We take the human body, a marvelously designed mechanism by a wonderful God, for granted. Here are a dozen questions to see what YOU know about YOU. 1. What is the correlation between I.Q. and dreams? 2. What is the largest cell in the human body? 3. What is the…

Most have heard of the 27 books in the New Testament. Recent discoveries on the internet have uncovered a possible 28th book – the “Chain Letter of Paul the Apostle to the Corinthians.” Here are some excerpts: With love all things are possible. This epistle comes to you from Paul…