Grif.Net

A college professor had the mysterious habit of removing a tennis ball from his jacket pocket as he walked into the lecture hall each morning. He would set it on the corner of the podium. After giving the lecture for the day, he would once again pick up the tennis…

[BJ forward this candid look at growing older in a technologically-young world] When I bought my Blackberry I thought about the 30-year business I ran with 1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes videos, pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter. I signed up under duress…

A young woman was in love with two men and could not decide which of them to marry. Finally she went to a marriage counselor. When asked to describe her two loves, she mentioned that one was a great poet and the other a renowned crêpe chef. “Oh,” said the…

Read on a blog about America’s deer hunters and came to a startling conclusion. The state of Wisconsin has gone an entire deer hunting season without someone getting killed. That’s great. There were over 600,000 hunters expending millions of rounds of high-powered ordinance. Allow me to restate that number. Over…

On midnight on New Year’s Eve, thousands of birds fell dead right out of the sky in Arkansas and Louisiana. Many asked “Where was the President in this national crisis?” Vacationing in Hawaii. But the real question? Where were Dick Cheney and Sarah Palin? Inquiring minds want to know. Newsflash:…

“I have the theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance?” “My weight problem is hereditary. It was passed on from my mouth to my stomach.” “The problem with square meals is that they make you round.” “In…

I just got off the phone with a friend in North Dakota. She said that since early this morning the snow has been nearly waist high and is still falling. The temperature is dropping below zero and the north wind is increasing. Her husband has done nothing but look through…

[Some old, some new but time to recycle the smiles. Where did the “chicken cross the road” originate? The first known appearance in print occurred in 1847 in ‘The Knickerbocker’, a New York monthly magazine: “There are ‘quips and quillets’ which seem actual conundrums, but yet are none. Of such…

Back in the 70’s when I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead. Don’t know about you, but I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.…

The cheerful girl with bouncy golden curls was almost five. Waiting with her mother at the checkout stand, she saw them: a circle of glistening white pearls in a pink foil box. “Oh please, Mommy, can I have them? Please, Mommy, please?” Quickly the mother checked the back of the…

[Gramma sent me this common-sense look at state budget problems] THE Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor’s dog and, since nothing was done, bites the Governor as well. **The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon…

A cement mixer collided with a prison van on the Kingston Pike. Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for 11 hardened criminals. ~~ A policeman spotted a woman driving and knitting at the same time. Driving up beside her, he shouted out the window, “Pull over!” “No,” she…

[Even MORE indications of getting older . . . ] You remember when Google, Wii. Netflix, iPod, email, modem were unheard of and a mouse was something that made you climb on a table. You use more 4 letter words –“what?” “when?” Notice everything they sell in stores is “sleeveless”?…