Grif.Net

With all the finery of new clothing for Christmas I had to remind the ladies of our church that if they questioned whether an item was suitable to their fashion tastes, they should just say “Thank You”, accept it graciously, and turn the other chic. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected]…

After another long sermon that caused many of my congregation to fight sleep, a dear saint came up after the sermon and told me, “Your sermon reminded me of the peace and love of God.” I beamed (humbly, of course) replying, “Why thank you. What in the sermon made you…

In the midst of the 19th Century, Charles Haddon Spurgeon was called the “Prince of Preachers”, often filling his church with 6,000 or more to hear his share the Gospel. At the close of a particularly stirring message, a stern-looking matronly woman waited in the throngs to confront the pastor.…

A pastor and a democratic senator passed away at about the same time and met at the Pearly Gates. Being a humble servant, the minister deferred and allowed the politician to enter first. The senator was warmly embraced by St Peter and ushered to a limo and taken to the…

[Sometimes what is printed in the bulletin or said in announcement do not come out exactly the way it was intended] “Mr Smith was elected and accepted the position of head deacon. We could not find a better man.” “The church rummage sale will be held next Saturday. Ladies, please…

The owner of a bed-and-breakfast wanted to name the three available rooms in his place after Books of the Bible. He finally settled on naming the rooms ‘Matthew’, ‘Mark’ and ‘Luke’, but was at a loss as to what to name the bathroom. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected] www.grif.net “Jesus…

On New Year’s Eve I found a four-leaf clover in a patch of poison ivy, and now I’m waiting for a rash of good luck. I don’t feel religious out in the woods cutting firewood. Seems I can no longer hear a Stihl small voice. Questions asked by grif.net reader…

I’ve been dieting for a week and all I’ve lost is seven days. Give me ambiguity or give me something else. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. Why experiment on animals with so many lawyers out there? There are two rules for success in life. Rule 1: Don’t tell people…

It takes an odd person who can enjoy browsing old cemeteries and smile at fascinating things on tombstones! Here is a collection: From Tombstone, Arizona’s famous Boot Hill: Here lies Lester Moore Four slugs from a .44 No les no more ___________________________________ Harry Smith of Albany, New York: Born 1903–Died…

Bob (at Dairy Queen): “Could I have a hot fudge sundae with extra hot fudge?” Counter Girl: “The hot fudge only comes in one temperature, sir.” ~~~ A few years ago, I commented (at Hardees): “I guess Christmas falls on a Friday this year.” Employee: “Oh my goodness. I really…

[This is the final choice of special grif.net Christmas stories from the past 16 years. Sadly, it is from 2012] ‘Twas 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38, when 20 beautiful children stormed through heaven’s gate. Their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air. they could hardly believe all the…

[This is the sixth serious grif.net story from the past 16 years of Christmas poems and stories] The old man sat in his gas station on a cold Christmas Eve. He hadn’t been anywhere in years since his wife had passed away. It was just another day to him. He…

CHRISTMAS STORY FROM GOSPEL OF LUKE “And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. (This taxing was before Cyrenius was governor of Syria.) And all went to be taxed, every one into his own…