Grif.Net

Advice is cheap – but some things are priceless. Here is some wisdom from 19 years of the grif.net blog (can you imagine I’ve been doing this that long?) *Insomnia: “Sleep on the very edge of the bed and you will soon drop off.” *Survival: “Think. It’s what you do…

Here is a simple quiz (1 in 50 chance of getting the answer right, since every answer is at least one State) 1. State with the longest coastline? 2. State with the shortest coastline (if it has any coast; many states are landlocked and have none)? 3. States that border…

[12 days in and mine are still holding up] I will never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times just to be sure. I will try to avoid people during the flu season. And the other nine months of the year, too. I will try…

[A friend sent this report on a special Christmas present] Paul received an automobile from his brother the stock broker as a Christmas present. On Christmas Eve when Paul came out of his office, a street urchin was walking around the shiny new car, admiring it. “Is this your car,…

One of my friends sent this “oldie but goodie” about the Snowbirds who leave the frozen tundra and head to Phoenix or Tucson for the winter. You know you’re in Arizona in January because: Every restaurant in your town has the first name “El” or “Los”. You think six tons…

From the “You think it is cold where you live?” file: Friend in Minneapolis texted her husband this winter’s morning: “Windows frozen, won’t open.” Husband texts back: “Gently pour some lukewarm water over it.” Five minutes later the wife texted back: “Computer is really screwed up now.” ~~ Dr Bob…

I figured out why I’m fat! I shampoo in the shower every day. The shampoo that I use in the shower for my hair runs down my body. On its label it has printed very clearly this warning: ‘For extra body and volume.’ No wonder I’ve been gaining weight! So…

My wife just called me. She said, “Two of the girls in the office have just received bouquets of flowers for the New Year. And they are absolutely gorgeous.” I said, “That’s probably why they’ve received flowers then.” Now the wife isn’t talking to me. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin [email protected]…

Why are half of the people I know below average? If Barbie is so popular, why do I have to buy her friends? Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard drive? If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know? If God dropped…

“One hundred religious persons knit into a unity by careful organization do not constitute a church any more than eleven dead men make a football team. The first requisite is life, always.” – A. W. Tozer [Enjoyed this personal testimony and evaluation by Nicole Cottrell] Lie #1. CHURCH IS OPTIONAL…

I take it you already know of tough and bough and cough and dough. Some may stumble, but not you, on hiccough, thorough, slough, and through. So now are you ready, perhaps, to learn of less familiar traps? *Beware of heard, a dreadful word, that looks like beard, but sounds…

[Time for first-of-the-month really bad word plays] I got a dart board for Christmas and put it on the ceiling, but I don’t like using it. It makes me throw up. I bought some Doritos swimming trunks today. I might go for a dip later. Speaking of that, I was…

[Some funny, some pithy, some inspirational. Here are some quotations as we say good-bye to 2014 and rejoice in a New Year ahead] “A year from now, you’re gonna weigh more or less than what you do right now.” ~Dr Phil McGraw “Hope smiles from the threshold of the year…