Grif.Net

My grandson was asking about the cost = of food at the corner store when I was a kid. So I shared . . = . “When I was young, my mom could send me to a shop with a = single dollar bill and I would bring back five…

Question: = What is the biggest drawback to retirement? Answer: You = never get a day off.   Question: Why do retirees smile all = the time? Answer: = Because they can’t hear a word you’re = saying!    Question: When is a retiree’s = bedtime? Answer: = Three hours…

A woman came home to find her retired husband waving a rolled = up newspaper round his head. Wife: “What are you doing = dear?”   Husband: “Swatting flies. I got three males and two = females” Wife: “How = on earth do you know which gender they = were?”  Husband:…

Top Ten Tell-Tale signs of a “Travel = Addict” (more truth about ME and my daughter = Lyssa)   1. Your travel = ‘bucket list’ is now down to only 14 pages   2. Coming home is more like = a vacation from traveling   3. On your home-ward =…

A tramp knocked on the door of = an historic English pub known as “St. George and the = Dragon”. The landlady answered the door. “Could you = give a poor man something to eat?” asked the = beggar. “No!” yelled the = woman, slamming the door in his face.…

I hired a carpenter to help me restore = an old farmhouse.  After he had just finished a rough first day on = the job, a flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric saw = quit, and now his ancient pickup truck refused to start. While…

I heard Delta Airlines was infusing its = cabins with a lavender-and-chamomile scent called = “Calm”.  Here are = some names that might better match “the ambience of the packed = economy cabin.” “Eau the = Humanity” “Giorgio’s = Arm-on-me” “Chanel No. 5 Inches less = Legroom” “Claustrophobique” “Mist =…

A friend = suggested going camping for my vacation. Camping?? That’s the dumbest = vacation I ever heard of in my life.   Like I’m gonna = work all year so I can go out and pretend I’m homeless for two = weeks?   But I DID want to =…

Saw obituaries in the news and = brought a tear to the eye. (1) Jacob Hall, inventor of throat = lozenges, has died.  Arrangements are pending, but it is assumed = there will be no coffin at his funeral.   (2) = John = Hokey, creator of the Hokey Pokey dance…

At the Ladies = Tea: “How many boxes of Thin Mints do I have to eat before I start = seeing results?” At a caf=E9: = “Two of the vegan customers were arguing over whether to call = their previous disagreement a = ‘beef’.” At Starbucks, = overheard a Bernie…

[The famous “Dr Bob”, founder of the = Grif.Net, recently sat down for an interview with reporters to share = insights about himself, his past and other milestones of the Grif.Net = daily blog celebrating 1996-2016 20-year anniversary. Presidents Day = seemed appropriate to look into the humble mind of…

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I = saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately = wanted to paint another one. When you thought I wasn’t looking, I = saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind…

*Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does = insanity.   *When a man brings a woman flowers for no reason, = there’s a reason.   *Alimony is the wages of sin.   *You = can always tell a real lady . . . but not much.   *Don’t = sow…