Grif.Net

My young son = enjoyed helping his mother when guests came to the house. Two = missionaries came for dinner and when the meal was nearly over, he went = to the kitchen and proudly carried in the first piece of apple pie, = giving it to me.  I thanked…

A fellow from = Texas visited a friend in Upstate New York, and was shown Niagara = Falls.  His friend said, “I know you folks like to boast = about how big everything is down there, but I’d wager you = don’t have anything like this in = Texas.” “No,”…

Q: How do you = clear out the bingo game at the Veteran’s Center? A: Yell, = “B-52”   Q: Why do dogs = avoid going to parades on November = 11th? A: Too many = vets   Q: When a = group of Vets put out a cover for…

Wife and I = were talking about two men mentioned in articles on our monthly rural = paper. She asked if I remembered them.   I said, = “I knew both of these men when they were teens 30 years ago.  = One was a clever, handsome devil hat I…

Heather M = remembered, “My mom told me to work hard until my savings account = looked like a  phone number.  Well, I finally did it!  My = current balance is 9.11” Ken M admits, “Life is like = a helicopter. Unfortunately, I don’t know how to operate a =…

[General = insights on human nature] People will accept your idea much more = readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first. People = will believe anything if you whisper it. People will buy anything = that is one-to-a-customer. People who complain about the way the = ball…

A young woman = was trying to decide whether of not to date a wealthy man several years = her senior.   “Do you = think he’s too old to be considered eligible?” she asked her = mother.   With a wink, = her mom replied, “Darling, he’s too eligible…

I asked a = single gal what would be the “perfect man”.  She told = me that the man she’d marry would “be like a robust fine = wine”.   I wondered = what she meant and must have had a quizzical = expression.   “Actually= ,” she added, “he…

My wife wanted = me to try to describe her. So I = simply said, “To me, you are A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, = K”. She asked, = “But what does that mean?” So I = listed them off for her. “You are: Adorable…

A small boy at = the lingerie counter timidly outlined his = problem.   “I want = to buy Mom a slip for her birthday, but I don’t know what size she = wears.”   “Is she = tall or short, fat or thin?” the clerk asked = sympathetically.  …

[The first = weekday of each month brings assorted words at play. Drive = carefully.]   Is rioting and = looting a drugstore in Portland defined as = pillaging?   When elephants = have dry skin, do they see a Pacadermatologist?   When I = realized the word “goodest” was…

What is Reformation Day? – Stephen = Nichols, Ligonier Ministry A single event = on a single day changed the world. It was October 31st, 1517. = Brother Martin, both a monk and a scholar, had struggled for years with = his church, the church in Rome. He had been…

It’s = confession time.  I’m  beginning to think I may be = getting too old for this trick-or-treat business. Why? 10. I get = out of breath just walking to the first house on the = block. 9. I have to = have our dog soften up the candy for…