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In A Hurry? [Author Unknown] Jack took a long look at his speedometer before slowing down: 73 in a 55 zone. Fourth time in as many months. How could a guy get caught so often? When his car had slowed to 10 miles an hour, Jack pulled over, but only…

A Sunday school teacher said to her children, “We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?” One child blurted out, “Aces!” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net “Jesus knows me, this I love”

As most Grif.Net readers know, I am both a missionary church-planter and a college professor with a warped sense of humor. A young lady who was writing a paper for my class came to me asked, “What is the difference between annoyance, anger and exasperation?” I replied, “It is mostly…

[Brian forwarded this message that has been making rounds since the 2004 elections! Methinks he must be from Texas! Please note that Texas is the only state with a legal right to secede from the Union – Reference the Texas-American Annexation Treaty of 1848. Of course, that didn’t stop the…

[Jen forwarded some info (have not checked them out but they seem legitimate) about Wal-Mart] Because at Wal-Mart, Americans spend $36,000,000 every hour of every day ($20,928 profit every minute) . . Because Wal-Mart will sell more from January 1 to St. Patrick’s Day (March 17th) than Target sells all…

Four Stages of Men and Santa Claus Age 1-12: You BELIEVE in Santa Claus Age 13-25: You DON’T believe in Santa Claus Age 25-60: You ARE Santa Claus Age 60-80: You LOOK like Santa Claus And a new one for 2009? Age 1-100: You THINK the government is Santa Claus…

Some famous lines on gun control (attributed to John Steinbeck) 1. Don’t pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he’ll just kill you. 2. If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck. 3. I carry a gun because a cop…

1. Der’s only one God, ya know. 2. Don’t make that fish on your mantle an idol. 3. Cussing ain’t Minnesota nice. 4. Go to church even when you’re up nort. 5. Honor your folks. 6. Don’t kill. Catch and release. 7. There is only one Lena for every Ole.…

Due to recent economic crisis, budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity gas and oil, The “Light at the End of the Tunnel” has been turned off. We apologize for the inconvenience. ~~ Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net “Jesus knows me, this I love”

One night a teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos, and pierced nose. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. “Dear,” said the mother diplomatically, “he doesn’t seem very nice.”…

Bill forwarded this story about an elderly couple who stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip. When leaving, the elderly woman unknowingly left her glasses on the table and she didn’t miss them until they had been driving…

More choices for the best (or wurst) puns, this the December batch: “She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.” or “A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net “Jesus knows me, this…

Obama