Daily Humor

Attila walked into a diner in Texas, put down his = sword and shield on the stool next to him. The waitress asked, = “What can I get ya, Hun?”   ~~ Dr Bob Griffin = [email protected] www.grif.net = "Jesus Knows Me, This I = Love!"  

A weasel walked into a restaurant.   The waitress = looked at him amazed and said, “In all my years here, I’ve = never see a weasel in our place.  But hey, welcome.  What can = I get you.”   “Pop” goes the weasel. [hat tip to = Sharon for…

During one semester in the late = 1990’s I taught a logic class at Pillsbury College, and asked this = question: “If Philadelphia is 100 = miles from New York and Chicago is 1000 miles from Philadelphia and Los = Angles is 2000 miles from Chicago, how old am I?”…

I took one of those = “on-line” time-wasting tests to see it my vocabulary showed = if I was really ‘old’.  I aced the quiz because I = <am> old (and I’m okay with that). If you are under 30 = you may have trouble with some of these catch-phrases/words…

A police officer called the station on his = radio.    “Captain, I have an interesting case here.  = An old lady shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just = mopped.” His superior asked, :”Well, do you have the = woman in custody?”   “Not = yet,”…

&= quot;When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was = the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to = be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’.   T= hey told me I didn’t understand…

From my 70 years of = experience, I share the following advice . . . Why don’t = Americans fear Friday the 13th of April?  With the April = 15th Tax Deadline looming, nothing scares them = anymore Even on Friday the 13th I don’t have any = superstitions.  Personally,…

[Some friends suggested more = “cross” breed dog jokes. To show I’m not the only = person with really lame humor, I’m including some, along with my = own jokes about dogs]   Q: What do you = get if you mix a Labrador and a Yorkie? A: I think…

In an effort = to make churches more attractive to the younger generations, some = denominations are considering change: Their church location will = be listed as a =E2=80=9CSafe Space=E2=80=9D, so Millennials will not be = afraid to come.   Their church = will have a listing on =E2=80=9CNew Family…

[Returning from California – praise God, I = escaped alive but with far less money – I found they had some odd = breeds of dogs out there]   Pointer crossed with a Setter =3D Poinsetter, a = lovable Christmas pet.   Pekingese crossed with a Lhasa Apso =3D Peekasso,…

Frank was sitting in his living room when the doorbell = rang. Upon answering the door, he found a 6-foot tall cockroach that = grabbed him by the neck and beat him about the head and shoulders, then = leaves.   The next = night, the doorbell rang and it…

[= Getting older isn’t for sissies. Perspective comes to me that even = with a poorly-functioning leg hampers airports travel and swims with = grandkids, I am still able to travel and be with them and find other = outlets for fun and sharing love and memories with them.  Love…

(1) For teens: = When 4, 6, 8, and 9 = were all killed, who were the detectives suspicious = of?   (2) For = elementary kids: What is E.T. short for?   (3) For = kindergarteners: What did the right eye say to the left = eye?   (4)…