Did you know . = . . that you can’t beat a hard-boiled egg for = breakfast?   Did you know . = . . that a movie about “hot dogs” was once a real oscar = weiner?   Did you know . = . . that most Americans find…

[It’s = the 1st of the Month and that means PUNS.  Our Tom = Swifty adverbs are from the letter “O” for = February.]   "What’s a = wide-angle lens?" asked Tom obtusely.   “My = bicycle wheel is damaged,” lamented Tom = outspokenly   “I = prefer trout to…

[As with part = 1, this is purported to be summaries of the Bible from elementary = school-aged children. Some of it might be from kids; most = not]   When Mary = heard she was the mother of Jesus, she sang the Magna = Carta.   When the three…

[WE ARE TOLD = “children were asked questions about the Bible and their answers = have not been retouched nor corrected; all spelling is original.” = Some seem a little too clever for a child and methinks are about as pure = as the driven slush]   In the first…

“I care = not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I = think of what I do.” – = Theodore Roosevelt   “Everythi= ng you’ve ever wanted is sitting on the other side of fear.” = – George = Addair   “Be…

When I think = of an “icebreaker”, my first reaction is “fat = penguin”.   I can’t = take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him. I = guess that’s what I get for buying a pure bread = dog.   I opened the…

What kind of = award does Wisconsin’s top dentist get? Just a little = plaque.   What is the = number one reason patients don’t show up for root = canals? They lose = their nerve.   What do kids = call a dentist’s office? The filling = station.  …

What is the = best way to criticize your boss?  Very quietly, = so he cannot hear you.    Our computers = went down at the office today, so we had to do everything manually. = It took me = fifteen minutes to shuffle the cards for = Solitaire.    …

*I recently = started speed reading. So far, I can read “War and Peace” in = ten seconds. It’s = only three words, but it’s a start.   *I bought the = world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it = terrible, but it’s also terrible.   *I just wrote…

A foot of snow = on a school day was a dream come true.   Abilities were = discovered because of a “double-dog-dare.” =   Saturday = morning cartoons weren’t 30-minute ads for action = figures.   No shopping = trip was complete unless a new toy was brought =…

“A bird = doesn’t sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a = song.” – Maya = Angelou   “The sun = himself is weak when he first rises and gathers strength and courage as = the day gets on.” – = Charles Dickens   “A…

Little is = known about the hunchback of Notre Dame who lived in the bell tower and = would run around putting his head against the vibrating bell and push it = to enhance the sound.  One day he slipped and fell hundreds = of feet to his death. Peasants…

DID YOU KNOW . = . . changing your iPod’s name to Titanic will not make it sync = faster?   DID YOU KNOW . = . . a Texas gambler visiting Vegas put a cow in an elevator so he could = raise the steaks?   DID YOU KNOW…