[Topics for discussion if you find extra time in the TSA lines = at the airport this morning] Who invented the first airplane that co= uldn’t take off? The Wrong Brothers.   ~~ Why did the librarian get chucked off the plane= ? Because the flight was overbooked.   ~~…

[Continue with “s” adverbs in our stroll thru Tom S= wifty wordplays these past 2 years. Some of these need to be read aloud to = get full pun-ishment]   "Hey, you’re stepping on my foot!" said Tom stand= offishly.   "I can’t tell you anything about my salivary glands,"…

A pastor was asked to speak to an audience of 150 teens.  = He pulled out a crisp $20 bill and asked, “Who wants this $20 bill?&#= 8221;   All 150 teens nodded.   He said, “I am going to give this money to someone,= but first….” He then proceeded…

NOT mentioning names, but someone living at my address just may= be joining me in the “75 Club” today.  She CLAIMS not to = be “getting older”, but methinks a review of her month’s = adventures betrays her age,  For example: >> She gets win= ded putting together a picture…

Two Hollywood stars ran into each other at the door of their ps= ychiatrist’s office.  = “Hello, there,” said one. “Are you c= oming or going?”   “If I knew that,” said the other, “I wou= ldn’t be here.”   ~~   At a party, a young wife admonished her…

I got 9 out of 10 on my road test for my driver’s license= =2E The last guy was able to get out of the = way.   I= f a car’s chasing you, you’ll definitely get tired. But if you chase cars, you’ll get exhausted.=   Two Cadill= ac…

Mom told me to take a bath, but the tub was so heavy I decided = to leave it where it is.   I’m afraid of elevators, so I take steps to avoid = them.   Did you hear about the kidnapping at my Elementary school? Thankfully, th= ey woke…

[Fun for the whole family] Q: What is the best way to ca= tch a whole school of fish?A: With bookworms. Q: What makes the shrimp not share his treasure?A: He’s= a little shellfish.   Q: Why don’t fish play basketball?A: Because they= ’re scared of the net.   Q:…

A pastor once faced a group of his parishioners who were compla= ining about the same issues over and over again. One day, instead of listen= ing to the complaints, he told them a joke, and everyone cracked up laughin= g.   The= n, the pastor repeated the joke. A…

A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have= you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”= “Yeah,” the other cow says. “M= akes me glad I’m a penguin.”   ~~ &= nbsp; Once, my father came home and found me in f= ront of…

[True Story from a friend]One day my mother was out, and= my dad was taking care of me. I was maybe 2 or 3 years old. Someone had gi= ven me a little ‘tea set’ as a gift, and it was one of my favorite toys. Da= ddy was in…

[How well do you know the United States?  Here is a list o= f two-letter state abbreviations and two-word descriptions of a person/plac= e/thing closely associated with that state. Match them up for fun (no &#822= 0;quiz”, per se.) BUT if YOU have a better two-word link to a state,…

[How well do you know the United States?  Here is a list o= f two-letter state abbreviations and two-word descriptions of a person/plac= e/thing closely associated with that state. Match them up for fun (no &#822= 0;quiz”, per se). BUT if YOU have a better two-word link to a state,…