[Credit Jesse Greenspan’s historical information site. No humor, just some history!] Cinco de Mayo (May 5th), which takes place today, has become enormously popular in the United States, often serving as a reason to throw a “gran fiesta.” Yet despite its ubiquity, the holiday remains widely misunderstood. In fact, many…

A man walked into Macy’s shoe department and tried on a pair of shoes. “How do they feel?” asked the sales assistant. “A bit tight.” The assistant bend down to check the shoes and said: “Try pulling the tongue out. Now how are they?” “They thtill feelth a bith tighth.”…

Two gentlemen boarded a coast-to-coast flight and were seated next to each other on the jet liner. After breezing through the on-flight magazine, the first man turned to the other and asked, what do you do? The gentleman replied: “I am a pastor of a church.” “Oh,” said the first…

Man plans, God laughs. A dead man is mourned seven days; a fool, his lifetime. A heavy purse makes a light heart. An imaginary ailment is worse than a disease. God will provide. If only God would provide until He provides! If I dealt in candles, the sun wouldn’t set;…

[My good friend Carol forwarded possible pun-o-the-month suggestions. And yes, I definitely need new friends.] I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic. It’s syncing now. I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time. This girl said she recognized me from the community…

[This weekend my bride hit 64 and joined me on the verge of Medicare. Got me thinking about hymns meaningful to us “senior saints”.] Give Me that Old Timer Religion Precious Lord, Take My Hand (and Help Me, I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Get Up) Just a Slower Walk with…

A Sunday School teacher decided to have her 2nd grade class memorize Psalm 23, one of the most quoted passages in the Bible. She gave the children a month to learn the chapter. One little boy was excited about the task, but he just couldn’t memorize the Psalm. Although he…

10. God was worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions. 9. God knew that one day Adam would require someone to locate and hand him the remote. 8. God knew Adam would never go out and buy himself a new…

Three churches in town had “revival meetings” at the same week. After the revivals concluded, the three pastors were discussing the results with one another. The Evangelical Free minister said, “The revival worked out great for us! We gained four new families.” The Assemblies of God pastor added, “We did…

An elderly lady was well known for her faith and for her boldness in talking about it. She would stand on her front porch and shout, “Praise the Lord!” Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, “There ain’t no…

Living dead Business ethics New classic Sweet sorrow Plastic glasses Tight slacks Pretty ugly Exact estimate Found missing Act naturally Resident alien Genuine imitation Hospital food Same difference Alone together Silent scream Small crowd Soft rock Military intelligence Taped live Clearly misunderstood Definite maybe Working vacation Good grief Almost exactly…

My husband and I divorced over religious differences. = He thought he was God and I didn’t.   I used to have a handle on life, but it = broke.   You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to = me.   I’m not a compete idiot — some…

Jesus loves me, this I know, Though my hair is white as snow. Though my sight is growing dim, Still He bids me trust in Him. (CHORUS) Though my steps are oh, so slow, With my hand in His I’ll go On through life, let come what may, He’ll be…