A game warden = noticed how old Bud consistently caught more fish than anyone else. = Other guys would only catch three or four a day, but Bud would come in = off the lake with a boat full. Stringer after stringer was always packed = with freshly caught bass.…
04/17/17 Grif.Net – Do you Understand English?
[Observations and quotations about the foibles of = the English language] “I like the word ‘indolence.’ It = makes my laziness seem classy.” “The quantity of consonants in the English = language is constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in another. = When a Bostonian ‘pahks’ his ‘cah,’ the…
04/15/17 Weekend Grif.Net – Empty Easter Egg
Jeremy was born with a twisted = body and a slow mind. At the age of 12 he was still in second grade, = seemingly unable to learn. His teacher, Doris Miller, often became = exasperated with him. He would squirm in his seat, drool and make = grunting noises.…
04/14/17 Grif.Net – IRS Week (part 5)
[Pithy, = non-taxable statements about paying our income taxes] People who = save their money for a rainy day end up getting soaked by the = government. Taxation is a = bizarre system in which you spend money, save receipts, and somehow = supposed to come out ahead. …
04/13/17 Grif.Net – IRS Week (part 4)
[Overheard at the = water cooler during our week of jokes about = taxes] "I put = all my investment money into taxes. They’re the only thing that’s = sure to go up!" "The = Government says we should be proud to be paying taxes. I think I =…
04/12/17 Grif.Net – IRS Week (part 3)
[Continuing our week of random = ‘laugh-or-you’ll-cry’ jokes about = taxes] My retirement advisor shared = some ideas. "The upside of what I’m proposing is a huge profit. The = downside may result in 800 hours of community service." America = is a land of untold wealth. Most…
04/11/17 Grif.Net – IRS Week (part 2)
[Another episode of taxes = – Q&A] Q: How are an apple and a = I.R.S. auditor alike?A: They both look good hanging from a tree. = Q: What’s the difference between an IRS worker and a carp? = A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other…
04/10/17 Grif.Net – IRS Week (part 1)
[A week of random = ‘you-have-to-laugh-or-you’ll-cry-jokes’ about = taxes] If a politician and an IRS = agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you = go to lunch or read the newspaper? Tax Day is the = day that ordinary Americans send…
04/08/17 Weekend Grif.Net – Human Relations
The six most = important words: “I admit that I was = wrong.” The five most = important words: “You did a great = job.” The four most = important words: “What do you = think?” The three = most important words: “Could you please . .…
04/07/17 Grif.Net – Neighborly Language
In = addition to our “old words/phrases” of the past couple days = we see a different side of language from Canada. “Yanks must be = pretty confused when we tell them that a Coffee Crisp costs about a = Loonie, pretty good deal eh? Or, I’d like a dozen…
04/06/17 Grif.Net – More Words to Increase your Vocabulary
8. POPPYCOCK. = Have you ever = listened to somebody trying to talk about something that they know = absolutely nothing about? Like, you know that what they’re saying = is completely untrue, yet they insist on continuing to talk? Not = laughing! Poppycock has nothing to do with poppies…
04/05/17 Grif.Net – Increasing your Vocabulary
Even native = English speakers are constantly learning new words that they never knew = existed, even though many have been around for hundreds of years. Just = understanding one more word will help you make your way through the = minefield that is English. Here are a few =E2=80=98new=E2=80=99…
04/04/17 Grif.Net – Heavens to Murgatroyd
H= eavens to Murgatroyd! Murgatroyd? When was the last time you heard the = word Murgatroyd? There are so many “Lost Words from our youth. = ‘Words gone as surely as the buggy whip! Sad = really! T= he other day, a not so elderly (65) lady said something…