A police officer called the station on his = radio. “Captain, I have an interesting case here. = An old lady shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just = mopped.” His superior asked, :”Well, do you have the = woman in custody?” “Not = yet,”…
04/14/18 Weekend Grif.Net – Understanding Life
&= quot;When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was = the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to = be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. T= hey told me I didn’t understand…
04/13/18 Grif.Net – Advice for an Oft-Dreaded Day
From my 70 years of = experience, I share the following advice . . . Why don’t = Americans fear Friday the 13th of April? With the April = 15th Tax Deadline looming, nothing scares them = anymore Even on Friday the 13th I don’t have any = superstitions. Personally,…
04/12/18 Grif.Net – Assorted Dog Riddles
[Some friends suggested more = “cross” breed dog jokes. To show I’m not the only = person with really lame humor, I’m including some, along with my = own jokes about dogs] Q: What do you = get if you mix a Labrador and a Yorkie? A: I think…
04/11/18 Grif.Net – Outreach to New Generations
In an effort = to make churches more attractive to the younger generations, some = denominations are considering change: Their church location will = be listed as a =E2=80=9CSafe Space=E2=80=9D, so Millennials will not be = afraid to come. Their church = will have a listing on =E2=80=9CNew Family…
04/10/18 Grif.Net – Unusual New Dog Breeds
[Returning from California – praise God, I = escaped alive but with far less money – I found they had some odd = breeds of dogs out there] Pointer crossed with a Setter =3D Poinsetter, a = lovable Christmas pet. Pekingese crossed with a Lhasa Apso =3D Peekasso,…
04/09/18 Grif.Net – Flu?
Frank was sitting in his living room when the doorbell = rang. Upon answering the door, he found a 6-foot tall cockroach that = grabbed him by the neck and beat him about the head and shoulders, then = leaves. The next = night, the doorbell rang and it…
04/07/18 Weekend Grif.Net – Mercies in Disguise
[= Getting older isn’t for sissies. Perspective comes to me that even = with a poorly-functioning leg hampers airports travel and swims with = grandkids, I am still able to travel and be with them and find other = outlets for fun and sharing love and memories with them. Love…
04/06/18 Grif.Net – Questions for Everyone
(1) For teens: = When 4, 6, 8, and 9 = were all killed, who were the detectives suspicious = of? (2) For = elementary kids: What is E.T. short for? (3) For = kindergarteners: What did the right eye say to the left = eye? (4)…
04/05/18 Grif.Net – Status Updates
[Always fun to see what others = are doing] I bought some shoes from a drug = dealer. I don’t know what he laced them = with but I can’t stop tripping. ~~ My boss just texted me: = "Send me one of your funny jokes!" I texted…
04/04/18 Grif.Net – Married
Playing with grandkids for a week, I knew I had to = have some good riddles. See how YOU would do. Riddle = #1: If the Burger King and Dairy Queen got married, where would = they live? Riddle #2: Why is the longest human nose on record…
04/03/18 Grif.Net – Choices
Out here in sunny California = and heard all about the great service in the hotel I booked. After = dropping my stuff in a lovely room, I excitedly headed down to the hotel = lobby. I = was only there for a minute when a very professional looking…
04/02/18 Grif.Net – Punz R Us
[First weekday of = the month so MUST send out the unusually bad word = plays] When I was younger, I always wanted to become a = Gregorian monk. Unfortunately, I never had the chants. I was mugged = in the grocery store parking lot. Fellow came up…