[Actual instruction labels found on products] ON A HAIR DRYER: Do not use while sleeping. =   ON A BAG OF FRITOS: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. = Details inside.   ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP: Directions: Use like regular soap. =   ON A FROZEN…

[In honor of = Father’s Day, Donna sent me these pithy little phrases from Dad. = Do any of these sound familiar to you?]   "Do it to = make your mother happy."   "Were you = raised in a barn?  Close the door!"   "You = didn’t beat me…

Here are 10 = specific ways you can pray today for members of our persecuted Christian = family: 1.  Pray = they will sense God’s presence      =  (Heb. 13:5) For [God] has said, "I will never leave you nor = forsake you."   2.  Pray = they will…

[As a pastor, I am pleased with hearing such phrases all the = time.  Ah, often.  Or once in a while.  Well, in my = dreams.]   > “Hey! It’s my turn to sit in the front = row.”   > “I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon…

Lost on a rainy night, a nun stumbled across a monastery and requested = shelter there. Fortunately, she was just in time for dinner and was = treated to the best fish and chips she’d ever had. =   After dinner, she stopped by the kitchen to thank the chefs…

From Cynthia: = “With all this rain, I think we need to build an ark.  But = don’t worry, I Noah guy.”   From Josh: = “Congratulations to the 2019 High School Graduates on getting thru = the easiest part of life.”   From Maria: = “I thought my dryer…

1. Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it? =   2. Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use, the = bubbles are always white?   3. Is there ever a day when mattresses are not on = sale?…

>Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers =   >Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case   >Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents   >Farmer Bill Dies in House   >Iraqi Head Seeks Arms   >President Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead =   >Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim…

“Twice = this week, I have watched an elderly individual fade into the busy life = in which we all live. One man just needed Panadol for his wife but the = shop assistant simply said it’s in aisle ‘6’. He = struggled to navigate the supermarket and as I…

One beautiful Sunday morning at the beginning of summer, a minister = announced to his congregation:   "My good people, I have here in my hands three sermons: a $500 = sermon that lasts five minutes, a $100 sermon that lasts fifteen = minutes, and a $20 sermon that lasts…

A fellow-pastor wrote . . . As a minister, my wife and I get = invited to many dinners.   At the table, the hostess turned to her six-year-old daughter and = said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" =   "I don’t know what to say," the girl…

Arnold and his wife were cleaning out the “junk drawer” in = the kitchen one day when he came across a ticket from the local shoe = repair shop. The date stamped on the ticket showed that it was over = eleven years old.   They both laughed and tried…

In our shop, our clerk asked the customer, "Cash, check or = charge?" after adding up her purchase.   The woman fumbled through her purse, pulling out its contents in = search of her credit card. Included were a wallet, compact, glasses and = a television remote control.   The…