[I always =
enjoy flight attendants and pilots who have ‘fun’ with =
announcements.]
“Thank you for flying Southwest. We =
know you have other choices but you’re too cheap so you’re =
flying with us.”
“Please =
keep your seat belts fastened and enjoy our complimentary =
turbulence.”
“We are =
now going to dim the lights for take-off. If you’re afraid of the =
dark, or that the Bogey Man will get you, don’t worry; he only =
flies with American Airlines.”
“We just =
found a wallet in the aisle. Now that we have your attention, here is =
some important safety information.”
“Ladies =
and gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Captain Braveheart and =
his magnificent crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt =
against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning =
bells are silenced, we will open the door and you can pick your way =
through the wreckage to the terminal.”
“Please =
make sure you take all your belonging with you. Anything left behind =
will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please =
don’t leave children or spouses.”
“If you =
are sitting next to a small child, or someone who is acting like a small =
child, please do us all a favor and put your own mask on =
first.”
“Please =
feel free to leave behind any of your items in the overhead compartment; =
I’m having a yard sale this =
weekend.”
“Thank =
you for choosing Southwest Airlines for your flight today. If you had =
any problems with this flight, just so you remember, you were riding =
with Delta.”
“Please =
notice that we are 10 minutes early. So, the next time we are 2-3 hours =
late we’ll just call it even.”
“Sit =
back. Relax. Enjoy our hospitality. Or you can sit up and be tense. The =
choice is yours.”
~~
Dr Bob Griffin =
[email protected] =
www.grif.net =
"Jesus =
Knows Me, This I =
Love!"