Grif.Net

09/30/25 Grif.Net – Good News/Bad News for Pastors

09/30/25 Grif.Net – Good News/Bad News for Pastors

[A frien=
d asked for some “pastor/church humor” for the 25th =
celebration of her pastor at the church. Kudos to the brother with a long t=
enure; 16 years was my longest. So share this old 1996 Grif Net with everyo=
ne because it may me smile again.]

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nbsp;

GOOD NEWS/BAD NEWS FOR PASTORS

 

Good News=
: You baptized seven people today in the river.

Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.

 

Good News: The =
Women’s Guild voted to send you a get-well card.

Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.

 

Good News: The Elder Board ac=
cepted your job description the way you wrote it.

Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search c=
ommittee to find somebody capable of filling the position.

 

Good News: You f=
inally found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same way yo=
u do.

Bad News: The choir mutinied.

 

Good =
News: Mrs. Jones is wild about your sermons.

Bad News: Mrs. Jones is also wild about the "Simpsons," &quo=
t;Beavis and Butthead" and "Texas Chain Saw Massacre."

 

Good =
News: Your women’s softball team finally won a game.

Bad News: They beat your men’s softball team.=

 

Good News: The tr=
ustees finally voted to add more church parking.

Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of your parsona=
ge.

 

Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.

Bad News: You were on vacation.=

 

Good News:=
Your deacons want to send you to the Holy Land.

Bad News: They are stalling until the next war.

 

Good News: Your big=
gest critic just left your church.

Bad Ne=
ws: He has been appointed the Head Bishop of your denomination.

 

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Good News: =
The youth in your church come to your house for a surprise visit.

Bad News: It’s in the middle of the night and they=
are armed with toilet paper and shaving cream to "decorate" your=
house.


~~

Dr. Bob Griffin
“Abhorring =
all my sin, adoring only Him”

[email protected] www.grif.net

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